F*ck Them Kids

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In the vibrant world of Absolute Batman, a meme iconic to the web, showcasing the legendary NBA player Michael Jordan, has been given a tangible form. Although Jordan no longer graces the basketball court, his presence continues to echo in the digital realm through Internet memes. One such meme humorously portrays Jordan’s disdain for losing, regardless of the competitive arena, even if the victory might advantage children. This recurring joke about Jordan’s perspective on kids has now found a resonance with Bruce Wayne’s Dark Knight character in DC’s Absolute Universe, as he appears to have embraced this same philosophy.

CAUTION: The discussion below contains spoilers for Absolute Batman #6.

In issue #6 of “Absolute Batman,” penned by Scott Snyder, Nick Dragotta, Frank Martin, and Clayton Cowles, we delve into Batman’s climactic battle against Black Mask and his gang, the Party Animals. The storyline concludes Batman’s fight with Black Mask, while subtly hinting at impending threats from villains such as Absolute Joker and Bane in the future. Our focus today lies on Batman’s encounter with Black Mask’s crew.

In a twist of events, Batman arranges for Penguin to drop him off near Black Mask’s server-laden boat. Engaging members of the Party Animals, Batman systematically takes them down, one after another, before shoving them overboard with a life raft for their survival. The challenge intensifies as Batman faces off against not only adult foes but also children who have been corrupted by Black Mask’s malevolent influence.

Unyielding in the face of obstacles, Batman swiftly subdues a young assailant brandishing a knife. As the youth struggles and curses at him, Batman seizes the boy by the back of his head. “Hold it, kid,” Batman says, “I’m not your opponent.” The youth insists, “But I’m just a kid!” Batman looks intensely at the child before nonchalantly tossing him high into the air. And, indeed, he does soar upwards before plunging into the water.

Batman kicks kids.

Batman Mimics Michael Jordan “F*ck Them Kids” Meme

The origin of the Michael Jordan meme goes back to 2016, during a playful shooting contest between basketball legends Michael Jordan and Chris Paul at a summer camp for children. In an amicable wager, if Jordan missed a shot, he would provide the kids attending the camp with free sneakers. Given his competitive spirit, Jordan couldn’t resist this challenge and made every shot, leaving the kids without their free shoes.

Looking back to 2018, I found myself on a platform then known as X (later Twitter), where I shared a classic black-and-white image of Jordan’s face, accompanied by the phrase “F*ck them kids”. Initially meant to be an inspiring poster, it soon transformed into a humorous meme that people have repeatedly used online.

Michael Jordan isn’t the only famous figure to appear in memes. Hayden Christensen, who played Anakin Skywalker, has seen his face used with the “F*ck them kids” catchphrase on social media platforms. These memes reference Anakin Skywalker’s dark transformation into Darth Vader, where he killed innocent Padawans at the Jedi Temple in “Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith.

Absolute Batman Is One of DC’s Most Unpredictable Comics

In the graphic novel Absolute Batman, Scott Snyder and Nick Dragotta demonstrate exceptional skills in storytelling. Their innovative twists on Batman’s legend are captivatingly original. Among the transformations introduced are the death of Thomas Wayne while sparing Martha, Bruce growing up alongside members of Batman’s villainous crew, a reimagining of Alfred Pennyworth as an undercover agent with no ties to the Wayne Family, and much more.

The alterations to Batman’s rogues gallery are particularly intriguing. The question arises as to whether characters like Riddler, Penguin, Two-Face, Killer Croc, and Catwoman will maintain their reformed paths or slip back into criminal activities, as is often depicted in the main DC Universe. Furthermore, beyond this core group, there’s also the concern of the potential return of villains such as the Joker and Bane. The ending of Absolute Batman #6 hinted at both Absolute Joker and Absolute Bane, although we have yet to witness Bane’s appearance. However, the glimpse of the Joker that was provided is truly chilling.

Absolute Batman #6 is on sale now.

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2025-03-20 20:10