Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

In reflecting upon Jessica Ennis-Hill’s life journey, I am struck by the remarkable resilience and determination that she has demonstrated throughout her illustrious career. Her mental fortitude, evident even in the face of adversity, is truly inspiring.


This interview first appeared in TopMob magazine.

Jess Ennis-Hill vowed not to shed tears on live television as she signed up for the BBC family history program, Who Do You Think You Are?

Speaking candidly, the once-acclaimed athlete from Britain admits to being someone who holds back tears until they’re alone. During her competitive years, she presented a composed demeanor, concealing emotions effectively. However, even the strongest facades can crack, and indeed, cameras caught her in a moment of vulnerability. This emotional display was perhaps unsurprising given the revelations about her family that she encountered.

We gather at a studio in London for Ennis-Hill’s RT photo session. The 38-year-old mother of two is striking poses in a brilliant red outfit, displaying her athletic prowess that mirrors her performance when she clinched the heptathlon gold medal during the 2012 Olympics.

Despite her inherently optimistic personality and three world championship victories to her name, Ennis-Hill has faced challenges from the distressing revelations. In her own words, “I never thought it would affect me this much.”

Despite being hailed as one of the toughest and most inspiring athletes in British history, participating in a genealogy series – now marking its 20th anniversary – made her feel incredibly nervous.

“They don’t inform you of the journey ahead or their discoveries, which might involve a shocking revelation such as a serial killer in our family history. Given the deep ancestry they are investigating, I was anxious about what secrets might be uncovered. I discussed this with my mother, and she assured me that if they find something truly terrible, it won’t reflect on me personally. However, it’s hard not to feel connected to our bloodline.”

Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

She had pondered participating in the show during past seasons, but her anxiety often overcame her. However, now she’s decided to take part – “The children have grown a bit older. My son just turned 10 a few days back, and my daughter is six. It seemed like the perfect opportunity, as they are at an age where they are absorbing so much information and showing keen interest in their family.”

Ennis-Hill, who was born in Sheffield, grew up with a white British mother Alison, a social worker, and a black Jamaican father Vinnie, a painter and decorator. He immigrated to the UK at the age of 13. Throughout her life, she has been curious about one question – where did her remarkable strength and athletic abilities originate? This question led her on a journey to explore her family’s history.

She attributes her strength and athletic prowess to having consumed liquid tripe, a traditional Jamaican dish, during her toddler years, according to what her parents often said. However, Ennis-Hill suspects that her ancestry might have played a more significant role in her achievements, so she researched other notable athletes with Jamaican lineage.

Inquired about any notable athletes in her ancestry, she replied with a smile, “No, I didn’t find any.” However, during her inaugural trip to Jamaica, she unexpectedly uncovered a far more captivating demonstration of power and strength.

In her featured segment, researchers delve into her ancestry, uncovering her link to George Thomas White, a former slave on a sugar plantation in her distant past. Upon visiting the plantation, she expresses a chilling sensation, finding both the house and its meticulously maintained gardens stunningly beautiful yet burdened by a heavy historical weight. “The atmosphere was unsettling,” she says, “because it appeared so picturesque, but then there’s this haunting reminder of history lurking around.”

Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

It comes to light that White, born into slavery in 1795 and forced to work as a cooper manufacturing barrels for rum during his enslavement, eventually managed to purchase a portion of the land where he was once held in bondage.

As a passionate cinema enthusiast, I find myself captivated by the story of a man named White during the formal abolition of slavery in Britain. The British government implemented an unusual system known as “apprenticeship,” whereby those once enslaved were required to labor for 40.5 hours weekly without pay for their former owners. However, they could be compensated as “hired hands” for any additional work hours. Despite being offered extra tasks on the plantation, White declined, instead finding ways to generate his own income independently. Eventually, he amassed enough wealth to purchase the land from his former enslaver at a cost of £160. Ennis-Hill, who witnessed this tale in Jamaica, felt immense pride for White’s remarkable resilience and determination.

She journeyed to Jamaica along with her father Vinnie, who last visited the island since his teenage departure. “I’d often pondered why he never returned. Yet, it’s not always wise to inquire excessively,” she notes.

Over time, Vinnie grew increasingly candid about the hardships he faced when leaving Jamaica and establishing himself in Britain – transitioning from a beloved country to one where he encountered racism and felt alienated. Notably, this change also brought about a heart-wrenching rift within his family.

Dad found the process of moving to England extremely challenging. Initially, it was just his parents who made the journey, leaving him behind with his brother. Later on, his parents moved to America without him. Instead of returning to Jamaica, he opted to stay with his grandparents here, which is why he felt disconnected and apprehensive about going back.

The experience of returning seemed extremely therapeutic for him, according to her. She affirmed with enthusiasm, “Absolutely, one hundred percent.” He expressed it as the best trip he’d ever taken. They departed on his birthday, and just before their journey, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. With so much on his plate, this adventure arrived at a particularly opportune moment for him. Throughout, he kept exclaiming, “Wow, Jess! This is incredible!” Just remembering it brings a smile to her face.

On her maternal line, there was an age-old enigma dating back to 1919. It was a family tale that Ennis-Hill and relatives had heard many times: Great-great-grandmother Maud mysteriously disappeared with a suitcase one day, leaving behind her young offspring without a trace or a goodbye. However, during the TV show, it was uncovered that Maud wasn’t just gone; she had been institutionalized in psychiatric hospitals until her passing, and this information was unknown to everyone within the family. Her whereabouts remained a mystery until then.

In the initial stages of Maud’s hospital stay, when she was still unaware, her 11-year-old daughter, Jess, passed away. This tale is filled with sorrow on multiple fronts, affecting not only Maud but also Jess’s great-grandfather, who remained silent about his own mother. Tragically, Maud never had the chance to meet her grandchildren or great-grandchildren, and it brings Ennis-Hill deep sadness just to contemplate this situation.

“The thought crossed my mind: ‘Suppose I were suddenly taken to an institution, never to see my children again, and while I was there, my little girl passed away, yet no one informed me.’ I find it hard to fathom such a scenario.”

She found herself pondering if Maud ended up in an institution due to her illness or her free-spirited, non-traditional personality. It turned out that she had filed charges against her husband for domestic abuse, yet chose to drop them.

“She remarks that some aspects of her conduct, being a woman, were viewed unfavorably by society. Women were often expected to adhere to certain norms, and she did not fit into that mold. Thus, a part of me wonders if she found herself in this institution because she simply refused to conform to societal expectations?”

Despite treatment records indicating she exhibited aggressive behaviors, it seems more socially acceptable for her husband to inform their children that she left the family during Maud’s time, rather than disclose her institutionalization due to societal taboos surrounding mental health. Conversely, Ennis-Hill, a psychology graduate from the University of Sheffield, has consistently emphasized the significance of open dialogue about mental health issues.

As a passionate moviegoer, I’ve always admired the journey of this remarkable athlete. Her family, coaches, medical team, and therapist have been her pillars of strength throughout her career. Yet, she openly acknowledges battling anxiety, a struggle that seems almost inevitable in such a high-pressure setting. She once shared, “Being an athlete, I’ve always felt anxious and jittery due to the unpredictable nature of my sport. I often yearned for a crystal ball, a glimpse into the future, and some reassurance: ‘This is what’s going to happen, and it’s all going to work out fine.'”

As a movie buff putting myself in her shoes, today she admits her worries are primarily focused on the well-being of her kids. “I can’t help but feel that sets me on edge for another tense chapter. At night, I toss and turn, mulling over their future as teenagers, and it’s like being caught in a whirlpool.”

As a mother myself, I can attest that being a parent is a constant whirlwind of thoughts and worries, especially when it comes to our children. It seems that every decision we make has the potential to impact their future in some way, and this can be overwhelming at times. However, I’ve come to realize that while it’s essential to plan for our kids’ well-being, dwelling on every minor concern may not always be productive or healthy. Balancing between being vigilant and allowing them the freedom to grow and learn is a delicate dance that each parent must navigate in their own way. So, yes, I understand the mother in this scenario feeling a tad premature about her worries, but I also acknowledge the underlying sentiment of wanting the best for her children. It’s a part of being a parent, after all.

Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

In general terms, could we describe her as someone who is mentally sound? Absolutely! She appears to be extremely joyful, contented, and she feels incredibly fortunate for the successful career path she’s followed, which seems to have left her relatively unaffected.

She expresses concern rather than optimism regarding the country’s youth. “The mental wellbeing of our children is at an all-time low,” she notes, adding that the aftermath of the pandemic continues to be felt, with kids avoiding school and being affected by social media.

“My son is asking for a phone, but I’m saying no for now because their brains aren’t fully developed. Phones can be addictive, which means you can’t help constantly checking them every couple of minutes. He won’t have one right away. I’m not sure if he’ll get one until he’s in high school, and even then, it might not be a smartphone.”

When we catch up with Ennis-Hill, she’s almost ready to depart for Paris as part of the BBC’s Olympics commentary team. Does it seem like 2012 was ages ago? “Indeed, it does, yet at the same time, no. It feels relatively recent, but my mind is filled with vivid memories from those years. However, a great deal has transpired in the past dozen years; my life has undergone extraordinary transformations.”

She points out that things have changed for her since then, as she explains, “From 2012 and a few subsequent years, my focus was entirely on a rigid routine aimed at self-improvement, centered around ‘me, me, me.’ Now, however, it’s not solely about her.”

Reflecting on the past, I can admit that I was self-centered. However, I believe a certain level of self-interest is necessary to succeed. You can’t be the best without focusing on your own performance. Nowadays, my priorities have shifted; my children are my top priority and everything else revolves around them.

Jessica Ennis-Hill on Who Do You Think You Are?: “I didn’t imagine I’d find it so upsetting”

In the show “Who Do You Think You Are?”, Jess appears to be remarkably kind, insightful, and intelligent. As she uncovers details about her great-great-grandmother and fourth-generation great-grandfather, she recognizes a shared experience that leaves her grateful for her fortunate circumstances.

“She remarks that both her forebears had their personal identities taken away. Tracing the name of her fourth-generation great-grandfather was an arduous task; he was merely seen as a number, a slave. Similarly, when Maud was admitted to the hospital, she was only identified by a number, devoid of any personal characteristics, simply referred to as a patient number.”

In the process of uncovering how her ancestors were suppressed by society, she also found out about their remarkable resilience. Despite enduring 50 years in an asylum, Maud showed incredible strength. Similarly, her son Jack, who was Jess’s cherished great-grandfather, demonstrated his inner fortitude by overcoming a difficult beginning and creating a fulfilling life for himself.

Regarding her fourth-generation great-grandfather, she’s deeply impressed by the mental fortitude he possessed to endure slavery. “The impact of such hardships could linger negatively across generations. Yet, he transformed his suffering and created something remarkable. He acquired vast tracts of land, even purchasing some of the land where he was once enslaved. This enabled him to carve out a prosperous future for himself. It’s an incredibly inspiring tale.”

Although it’s unlikely that she descended from high-level athletes, she strongly feels that she’s traced the origin of her strength. Her determination and fortitude must have been inherited somehow through generations, perhaps as a result of how her ancestors raised their children, who in turn raised their own kids, and so on.

Who Do You Think You Are? airs on BBC One and iPlayer.

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2024-08-06 02:39