As a devoted Star Trek enthusiast and seasoned movie reviewer, allow me to express my profound disappointment with the latest addition to the Star Trek universe – Star Trek: Section 31, featuring the talented Michelle Yeoh. This series is not merely subpar or mediocre; it’s astonishingly awful, a term I never thought I would use for any Star Trek production. Before delving deeper into my critique, let me assure you that I speak from a place of genuine love and high expectations for the franchise.
Initially, I’d like to make it clear that I hold a deep affection for Star Trek. When you mention ‘Star Trek’, I am referring to the original series (TOS), some of the first movies, parts of Enterprise, many episodes of Voyager, and select moments from Next Generation, excluding the content produced since then.
“Starfleet: Where fun goes to die”
– Actual Michelle Yeoh dialog, Section 31
allow me to clarify that I am a big fan of Michelle Yeoh, who is known for her quick wit, charm, and impressive martial arts skills. If by “Michelle Yeoh” you are referring to the actress who displayed these talents in the James Bond film “Tomorrow Never Dies,” where she sparred with Pierce Brosnan, among other memorable scenes, then yes, that is the person I am speaking of. This was back in 1997.
Thirdly, and it’s important to emphasize this, there are numerous aspects about this thing that are truly disappointing.
Or,
In third place, let me stress this point, there are so many aspects of this thing that fall short, it’s challenging to even list them all.
The script feels uncharacteristic, dull, and inconsistent with Star Trek as we’re accustomed to. Introducing various species and aspects may not suffice. At least the reunion of characters in the finale (fingers crossed) of Picard was a delightful, though possibly final, encounter. However, this new production brings together a group of insignificant individuals lacking charm, humor, elegance, and engaging conversation, which is rather… underwhelming.
“Borrrrrrring!”
-Actual Michelle Yeoh dialog, Section 31
It’s undeniably boisterous, clamorous, and raucously produced, there’s no doubt about that. However, it seems like it was created with absolutely nothing in mind.
In a scenario like this, having one of the world’s top martial artist actresses lead your project might seem like a surefire way to deliver impressive fight sequences. However, when she appears aging and the choice of makeup, hair, and wardrobe doesn’t flatter her, it becomes challenging to make those anticipated action scenes shine as expected…but there’s always room for improvement!
“Meh.”
-Actual Michelle Yeoh dialog, Section 31
As someone who takes on the role of a Director, allow me to share my perspective for a moment. When you opt for scenes filled with cuts, ZOOMs, slow-mo blurs, and an array of swift shots, it seems like you believe these elements intensify the action. However, I find that they tend to render the scene POINTLESS, making it hard for viewers to follow or truly appreciate its essence. Instead of elevating your actress’s expertise in her field, you diminish it significantly. In a sense, what was once foie gras is reduced to chopped liver.
You kill the buzz you are trying to accomplish.
This item assembles an assortment of supposedly underpar performers, venturing into cinematic territory uncharted by poorly-made films. It’s a shame for the actors, as their abilities are uncertain. However, the dialogue and actions they must deliver are so utterly senseless that within minutes it becomes clear that there is nothing substantial about them or the characters, making it pointless to invest any emotional involvement.
I can delve deeper into the storyline, include additional scenes, and discuss further elements, but you should have a good grasp of it by now. Despite attempts to make this feel like genuine Star Trek (I’ve encountered numerous articles that try to place this within the Star Trek timeline, and the movie itself is filled with charts, maps, and other visual details that go beyond reason, as if using similar fonts would trick you into thinking it’s authentic), what results is a production that falls short not just of professional standards, but even compared to many fan-written works.
I mean REALLY that bad.
The fact that they divided a four-episode series into “The First Star Trek Feature In Years!” for TV/Paramount+ instead of theaters is almost insignificant. However, if you’re brave enough to endure it, you could watch it all in one sitting on a binge marathon, which some might call nonsense.
The truth is, as many have warned and perhaps even feared, Section 31 is exceptionally poor. To put it mildly, I watched it so you don’t have to, which means you owe me quite a bit for sparing you from your curiosity. At my age, sacrificing valuable time on something that can never be regained is a significant loss, but the essence of this matter is clear: avoid Section 31 at all costs.
When I say that this movie on Paramount+ blazes trails uncharted by previous Trek series…it’s actually not a positive comment. Rest assured, I remain your friend and my watching this film for you is proof enough of that.
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2025-01-25 00:55