tWitch's Family Speaks Out: Shocking Revelations from Allison Holker's Memoir!

Stephen “tWitch” Boss’ family is looking for answers.

In their initial conversation following Stephen’s 2022 suicide, Ellen DeGeneres Show alumna Connie Boss Alexander and his younger brother Dre Rose expressed surprise over how Stephen was portrayed in Allison Holker’s memoir “This Far.

In an upcoming interview with CBS Mornings, Dre expressed his belief that individuals should be allowed to share their own narratives. He added that he felt uncomfortable when his story was presented and published in a magazine, along with a public campaign about it. According to him, “We are a family,” implying they should have been informed privately rather than through the media.

TopMob News has reached out to Allison’s rep for comment and has not heard back.

In her recently published memoir, Allison discusses the rumored substance abuse of Stephen, his financial hardships, and discloses findings from his personal diaries following his demise – among which are entries suggesting that he was a victim of childhood sexual abuse, according to her interpretations.

Although Allison, mother of Weslie (16), Maddox (8), and Zaia (5) together with Stephen, openly discussed her choice to disclose his journals prior to the book’s publication, Connie and Dre claimed they were unaware of their existence until the 37-year-old brought them up. Moreover, Connie expressed eagerness for an opportunity to read those journals herself.

She conveyed to Gayle, “Yes, I believe that’s true. It’s because these thoughts are his, and I want to be more connected. Perhaps it will give me a clearer perspective. After all, he is my son, and I have a sense of who he was and what he might have been thinking at times.

Regarding Dre, he wishes Allison, formerly married to Stephen for nine years, would be more open about the details in her journals.

He remarked that he would greatly appreciate the chance to thoroughly review all the journals. He’s confident they hold valuable insights and contains beneficial information. Moreover, he believes these journals might contain details about the individual’s personal and family life.

He went on to say that some parts from the journal might have been selectively chosen and discussed. He suggested being transparent and addressing everything thoroughly.

Before their scheduled conversation with Gayle, which will be aired on February 10 and 11, Connie publicly refuted Allison’s accusations against Stephen.

Connie posted on Instagram on the 8th of January, ‘I as a mother won’t leave these allegations unaddressed.’ We won’t be silent spectators as his reputation and heritage are questioned.

And amid the backlash, Allison clarified the purpose she hoped her book could serve.

In a post on her Instagram Story in January, she clarified that when composing her book, her sole aim was to reveal her personal experiences and a segment of her life with Stephen, with the intention of benefiting others, just as she aims to do for you.

Keep reading for more reveals from Allison’s book…

In her memoir “This Far“, Allison Holker reminisced about the time she left her church during high school and faced criticism from her community. She wrote, “I felt I was a wretched person, unworthy of God’s love.” A devastating event at seventeen seemed to reinforce this belief.

Allison chose not to reveal the specifics of the incident, but mentioned that its consequences permeated every aspect of her life. She admitted, “A voice inside me whispered that it was my divine punishment for abandoning faith in God.” Reflecting on this now, she realizes this was a blasphemous view of God.

Desiring to move past the incident, Allison chose to keep it private. In hindsight, she expressed regret and shared, “If I could go back, I would have acted differently.” She empathized with those in similar situations who are too afraid to speak up. She hopes her candidness encourages others to find their voice.

Allison recently discussed her experience in an interview on the Jan. 27 episode of “The Jamie Kern Lima Show“. She revealed, “An older man exploited my vulnerability as a young woman, particularly within the dance community where we idolize our mentors and blindly trust them.” Dance, she explained, can be physically and sexually demanding, even at a young age, and this was unfortunately taken advantage of.

After Allison participated in season two of So You Think You Can Dance and Stephen “tWitch” Boss reached second place on season four, they both reappeared in season seven, which is when their friendship began, although not as a romantic connection. However, it wasn’t during season 7 that they first met; instead, they crossed paths five years earlier at a party hosted by Allison’s dance partner from season 2, Ivan Koumaev.

At the party, one of Ivan’s contacts from the hip-hop scene approached Allison and introduced himself as tWitch. Intrigued, she asked him about his real name, to which he replied, “Stephen Boss.” Despite his energetic personality, Allison initially struggled to look past his unique appearance, characterized by fishnet tops, multiple piercings, dyed blonde hair, and a mohawk. This was too much for the Utah-raised Allison to handle at first.

In the early stages of their relationship, a significant encounter took place between Allison and Stephen, which she described as “memorable.” This encounter occurred when Stephen was part of a dance ensemble for the opening act of the Glee Live! In Concert tour. During one of his shows in Dublin, they found themselves exploring the arena before things heated up.

As Allison recounted in This Far, they unexpectedly ended up on scaffolding above the stage and started kissing. Their moment soon escalated until they were discovered by a security guard who had appeared out of nowhere, shining his flashlight near them. The guard asked, “Who’s up there?” They managed to suppress their laughter until the coast was clear, quickly got dressed, and rejoined the concertgoers. Allison admitted that this incident was one of the most passionate experiences she had ever had.

2013 marked the year when Allison and Stephen got married, already parents to Weslie born in 2008 from Allison’s previous relationship, they went on to have son Maddox in 2016 and daughter Zaia in 2019. They shared glimpses of their lives on social media, posting videos ranging from dance parties, Halloween costumes, to their daily home routines.

However, Allison suspected that social media might have added stress for Stephen towards the end. She wrote, “He had this idea we should always portray a perfect family, which was unrealistic.”

Allison believes the constant praise and admiration Stephen received for his sunny disposition created a sense of pressure. She wrote, “As his fan base expanded rapidly, he couldn’t step out in public without being complimented on his positive personality, how upbeat he seemed, or the positive energy he radiated. This must have put immense pressure on him.”

Despite this, Allison emphasized that the happy moments portrayed in their videos were authentic. She added, “Stephen was dealing with a complex emotional terrain. He oscillated between genuine happiness and deep sadness, like a dimmer switch controlling his emotions.

Following 19 successful seasons, The Ellen Degeneres Show concluded in May 2022, marking a mixed feeling for Stephen who served as both DJ and later executive producer. He was disheartened to depart from his second home but also saw it as a chance to relinquish the deejay role and pursue fresh, more challenging endeavors, she wrote. Although he yearned to take over as host, discussions with the network proved unfruitful. Stephen felt let down, yet in true tWitch fashion, he framed it positively.

The termination of the show didn’t lead to instability, as he still had a job, she stated. “We had numerous projects lined up.” However, this change disrupted Stephen’s routine. For nine years, the show provided his days with structure and rhythm. With no longer being tied to a schedule, Stephen had more time to delve into his thoughts. The troubled corners of his mind, which he had previously hidden while portraying cheerful tWitch on a daily basis, began to surface.

According to Allison, Stephen also became more irritable, struggled with sleep, and showed less enthusiasm for work, socializing with friends, and engaging in activities he once enjoyed.

Based on Allison’s book, Stephen embarked on a journey to investigate ayahuasca, a plant-derived substance known for causing intense hallucinations, skewed reality perception, and deep self-reflection. His intention was to tackle the burdens of parenthood, grapple with his lack of father figures in his life, and confront feelings of abandonment.

However, things didn’t go as planned, and Stephen asked a friend to pick him up early. Allison mentioned that such experiences should ideally last between three and seven days, followed by weeks of aftercare supervised by the shaman. Stephen returned home after less than 12 hours and resumed his work.

Allison’s account implies that this hasty retreat might have worsened the situation. She further explained that for individuals with pre-existing mental health issues, ayahuasca can aggravate hidden problems if proper supervision is not available. It can bring these issues to a head, so to speak.

As the former contestant on “Dancing With the Stars” stated, Stephen appeared noticeably different afterwards. She noted that his demeanor was distinctly unlike before. He no longer radiated joy or generosity; instead, it seemed as if he woke up every day on the wrong side of the bed. He wasn’t angry or rude to people; he just appeared agitated.

In “This Far”, Allison disclosed her findings about Stephen’s suspected drug habits. She admitted to knowing he smoked marijuana, but was shocked to discover that Stephen was often under the influence, even secretly smoking on the set of Ellen. To the best of her knowledge, this information was not known by others.

Later, while going through his phone app, Allison discovered he frequented local dispensaries every night.

After Stephen’s demise in December 2022, she recalled, she was searching for a pair of his favorite sneakers for his funeral service. “What I uncovered was much more than shoes,” she wrote. “There were numerous packets of psychedelic mushrooms – some were full, some half-empty, and some contained only one or two mushrooms. There were other substances that I needed to look up on my phone. It was like a treasure trove of drugs. I was astonished.”

An autopsy obtained by TopMob News in May 2023 revealed Stephen had no traces of drugs or alcohol in his system at the time of his death.

Three days before Stephen took his life on Dec. 13, 2022, at the age of 40, he and Allison celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary with a trip to Laguna Beach, California.

During this weekend trip, they talked about expanding their family, bought a sculpture as a shared memento, and she revealed to him a song she composed titled “Better Together.” In response, he gave her a black Prada suit.

Now, Allison ponders, “The questions keep coming. Did he buy me a black Prada suit so I’d have something elegant for his funeral? Was it a final romantic gesture or simply a twisted decision?

In Allison’s book, she narrates the final encounter between herself and Stephen, her kids, which occurred on a specific day.

At home after dropping off Maddox at school, they found Stephen conversing with their assistants and nannies before driving Weslie to class. As they left, Allison recalled saying, “See you. Love you,” without even bidding goodbye.

Following a Starbucks stop, Stephen took Weslie to school and told the teenager, “I wish I could have been your Superman.” This seemed unusual, but Weslie didn’t ponder it; she considered it just a peculiar fatherly gesture. They exchanged “I love you” before he drove off from the school lot – marking the last time Allison saw him. The image of Stephen subtly saying goodbye lingers in her mind to this day.

Later, Stephen didn’t show up at the gym or office as arranged but responded to messages regarding a video shoot scheduled for the following day. That afternoon, Allison spotted his car parked in their driveway but soon noticed he wasn’t home.

In the book, Allison recounts her unsuccessful attempts to contact Stephen, leading her to reach out to his assistant, family members, friends, and hospitals before filing a missing persons report. Tragically, police later informed her that Stephen had taken his own life on December 13, 2022.

“I let out an animalistic scream down the hallway,” Allison wrote. “The noise I produced was wild.”

Back in January 2023, I found myself at the heart-wrenching wake of my beloved Stephen. The event was a delicate dance between family desires and my commitment to respect his privacy. There were certain aspects of the service that stirred disagreement among us, such as the family’s insistence on an open casket. In the end, I granted a select group of relatives a brief, private viewing before it was covered for the rest of the gathering—with a firm request that no photos or videos be taken due to concerns they might find their way onto the internet.

To ensure Stephen’s privacy was safeguarded, my lawyers advised me to have everyone who viewed the open casket sign a confidentiality agreement. This requirement seemed to frustrate his family even more. As I confided, “The need for NDAs sparked a wave of exasperation among them.” They retorted, “If we all have to sign NDAs, then everyone has to sign NDAs.”

According to the book, a funeral followed the next day, with a Celebration of Life event taking place afterwards. Notable figures like Allison, Weslie, Ellen DeGeneres, Loni Love, and Wayne Brady graced the occasion as speakers during the February memorial.

In August 2023, Drè Rose, Stephen’s brother, expressed worry in a message about the treatment of their mother and family, which has been causing significant distress.

Notably, Drè mentioned in an Instagram post that this issue appears to originate from the disagreement within the family over the initial terms of the Non-Disclosure Agreement (NDA) presented for signing.

Furthermore, Dré noted that Weslie, Maddox, and Zaia’s interactions with Stephen’s relatives have been restricted.

In her book, Allison admitted to discovering that members of Stephen’s family were criticizing her on social media for various reasons such as the funeral arrangements, NDAs, and her absence at a Boss family reunion she wasn’t invited to. However, she stated that she made an effort to understand and empathize with a woman who had given birth to the love of her life.

Allison also dismissed claims that she was denying access to the children, explaining that she flew Stephen’s mother from Arizona to California for a Grandparents’ Day event at school, facilitated FaceTime conversations, and sent photos.

Additionally, she claimed that someone in Stephen’s family, whom she chose not to name, had accused her of being responsible for his death. This person later apologized, but Allison noted that the words could never be forgotten.

In “This Far”, Allison additionally remembered reading through Stephen’s diary following his demise. She penned down that some of his entries hinted at sexual abuse he experienced as a child, perpetrated by an adult male. This traumatic experience was something he had shared in strict confidence with his friend, who revealed the conversation to her only after Stephen’s death.

Despite their prominent roles on TV and popular social media presence, along with various brand endorsements, the assumption was that Stephen and Allison had no financial worries. However, in her book, Allison shared a contrasting narrative.

She clarified that she didn’t inherit Stephen’s wealth as one might assume. Instead, he had given away large amounts of money to family and friends, squandered funds on drugs and peculiar art collections. The tax bill he left her after his death amounted to $1 million. Both Allison and the accountant who delivered this news were deeply troubled by this revelation.

Allison stated that paying off this debt drained Stephen’s accounts. Furthermore, his suicide caused a breach of contract with certain business partners, some brands ceased working with her, and she had to catch up on outstanding bills.

However, Allison seemed to address those questioning her motives for releasing the book by stating that all proceeds from the book would go towards the mental health foundation she established in Stephen’s memory, Move With Kindness. Her hope was that this foundation would help prevent further losses of loved ones to suicide. In an Instagram Stories post on January 8, 2025, she expressed this intention.

Since Stephen passed away, Allison has sensed his spirit – even in her dreams. She described one such dream in ‘This Far’, two days after his death, as a series of memories followed by darkness. Upon waking up, she was shaken and the room seemed to move. A face appeared like the full moon, transforming into three faces, one of which she recognized – it was Stephen. He spoke softly, saying “I’m sorry” and “I love you.” Afterward, Allison felt a sense of tranquility. She wrote, ‘Though my husband no longer lived, for the first time since his death, I felt his presence.’ Addressing him, she said, ‘Thank you, my love, for bringing me peace.’

In her book’s prologue, she candidly confessed that her emotions towards her deceased husband are complex. She expressed deep sorrow for his untimely departure because he was an exceptional individual, a loving husband, and a wonderful father who touched everyone he met positively. Despite this sadness, she couldn’t dismiss the profound impact of his decision on their lives.

Throughout the book, Allison shared her experiences with grappling with feelings of anger towards Stephen’s death while still cherishing him in her heart. She acknowledged that romanticizing someone who has taken their life can be harmful and no one choosing such a path should be glorified. However, she asserted that it is possible to hate the act and hold deep affection for the person who made that decision. This duality of emotions exists within her.

She emphasized that moving forward was essential. She wrote that she no longer communicates with Stephen as intensely as she did during the first year after his passing, which is acceptable. She no longer feels bound to him. The children and she are gradually shaking off the trauma that once held them captive. Although she believes Stephen watches over them, providing comfort, she no longer depends on him like before. She now trusts her own judgement more. A year ago, a clear path forward seemed unimaginable to her, but now she can see it distinctly.

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2025-02-07 19:20

tWitch’s Family Speaks Out: Shocking Revelations from Allison Holker’s Memoir!

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