Stephen “tWitch” Boss’ mother wants to protect her son’s legacy.
After the release of her memoir titled “This Far”, Ellen DeGeneres’ mother, Connie Boss Alexander, accused Allison Holker of damaging Stephen’s legacy with allegations about drugs found at their home following his suicide in 2022, which she claims to have learned from his personal journals.
Connie expressed to Gayle King during their upcoming CBS Mornings interview on February 10th that she didn’t think there was an issue or problem as some may have suggested. However, she made it clear that she supports discussions about mental health awareness, acknowledging that something was happening towards the end which we were not aware of.
Connie went on to agree with it and noted that if the book aimed to raise awareness about such signs, she could express this more broadly without disrespecting his memory or the impactful legacy he left for his family. The question now arises when discussing his name, which has become a topic of concern for her.
Regarding Connie’s agreement with the idea that Allison’s statements have damaged Stephen’s reputation, she responded simply, “Yes, I agree.
In their initial interview since Stephen’s passing, Connie, accompanied by her son Dre Rose, underscored that Allison – mother to Maddox (8), Zaia (6), and Wesley (16) with Stephen – found it challenging to discuss Stephen’s life.
Connie added during a portion of the upcoming interview on February 11th, “I’m not implying my son was flawless, but I think there were situations where he experimented with different things.
Regarding Allison, she voiced her desire for unity within the family, which encompasses not only her but also Stephen’s brother Cameron, to uphold the legacy of the former So You Think You Can Dance contestant.
Allison stated on February 10th to CBS Mornings that Connie has been, and will remain, a source of positivity and love for Maddox and Zaia. She mentioned various traditions like Grandparent’s Day, shared meals, ice cream outings, and Cameron’s gaming sessions with Maddox. The hope is to maintain these customs over time while preserving Stephen’s memory jointly.
Connie and Dre previously shared how they were blindsided by the claims in Allison’s book.
As an ardent enthusiast, I firmly believe that everyone should have the chance to narrate their own tale. In the snippet from our upcoming interview released on February 7th, I expressed this sentiment to Gayle. I felt strongly that the story should not have been splashed across magazines or broadcast through a public campaign. Instead, we, as a family, should’ve been the first to know.
Keep reading for more bombshells from Allison’s memoir…
In the memoir “This Far“, Allison Holker shared her story of leaving her church during high school and facing criticism from her community. She wrote, “I felt that I was a wretched person and that God detested me.” At seventeen, she experienced an event so distressing that it reinforced her own beliefs about herself.
Allison chose not to disclose the specifics of what occurred, but remarked that “the consequences affected every facet of my life.” She continued, “There was a whispering voice in my head telling me it was my divine retribution for abandoning faith, an affront to God that I now recognize as grossly unjust.”
Desiring to move past the incident, Allison chose to keep it private. Looking back, she expressed regret and shared, “If I could go back, I would have taken action.” She sympathized with those in similar situations who are too fearful to speak up. “I hope that by voicing my regrets, I inspire others to assert themselves,” she said.
Allison later elaborated on her experience during a recent interview on The Jamie Kern Lima Show. She explained, “An older man exploited the vulnerability that women often face, particularly in the dance community where we idolize our instructors and place our trust in them. Dance can be physical and sexual, even at a young age, and that was manipulated.
After Allison participated in season two of So You Think You Can Dance and Stephen “tWitch” Boss finished second in season four, they reappeared together in season seven in 2010. However, their first encounter didn’t happen during that season. Instead, they met five years earlier at a party hosted by Allison’s dance partner from season two, Ivan Koumaev. At the party, one of Ivan’s friends from the hip-hop scene approached Allison and introduced himself as “tWitch.” Allison found this name cute but asked for his real name. He replied, “Stephen Boss.” Despite his lively personality, Allison initially struggled to look past Stephen’s appearance, which included a fishnet top with piercings in both nipples, nose, eyebrows, lip, and chin, as well as dyed blond hair and a mohawk. This was too much for the Utah girl.
In retrospect, their relationship began in an unforgettable encounter – it was during a gathering that Allison mentioned they “officially became a couple” at the season seven wrap party for So You Think You Can Dance.
Looking back at the start of their romantic journey, she vividly recounted an incident from the early days. Stephen was part of a dance troupe for the opening act of the Glee Live! In Concert tour, and they had been exploring the arena during one of his concerts in Dublin when things became intimate.
“Somehow we found ourselves on the scaffolding above the stage in the concert,” she reminisced in This Far. “We started kissing passionately. One moment led to another, and before we knew it, we were engaging in an act that I must admit was one of the most thrilling experiences I’ve ever had. Just as a security guard unexpectedly appeared, shone his flashlight towards us, and asked, ‘Who’s up there?’ We managed to suppress our laughter until he left, then quickly got dressed and re-entered the audience.
In 2013, Allison and Stephen got married, making Weslie (born in 2008), from Allison’s previous relationship, part of their family. Later, they had Maddox in 2016 and Zaia in 2019. They shared glimpses of their life on social media, posting videos of their dance parties, Halloween costumes, and daily home life.
However, Allison thought that social media might have caused stress for Stephen towards the end. She wrote, “He felt we should always present as a perfect family, which was unrealistic.” Allison believes the constant praise Stephen received for his positive personality created pressure.
“As his fan base grew rapidly,” she wrote, “he couldn’t go out in public without being complimented on his joyful demeanor, loving appearance, and the positive energy he radiated. This must have been exhausting for him.”
Allison emphasized that the happy moments depicted in their videos were genuine. “Stephen was dealing with a complex emotional terrain,” she added. “He moved between genuine happiness and deep sadness, switching as if his emotions were a dimmer switch.
Following 19 successful seasons, “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” concluded in May 2022, a mixed emotion for Stephen who held roles as both DJ and later executive producer. He was disheartened to depart from his second home but also saw it as an opportunity to relinquish his deejay role and venture into fresh, more challenging prospects, as he penned down. While he yearned to step into Ellen’s shoes as the host, discussions with the network proved unproductive. Stephen was dismayed but, in characteristic fashion, found a positive perspective on the situation.
Due to their packed schedules and numerous ongoing projects, the end of the show didn’t disrupt their employment stability. However, it led to a change in Stephen’s daily routine. For nine years, the show provided his days with structure and rhythm. No longer tethered to a schedule, Stephen found himself with more time to delve into his thoughts. The previously suppressed internal turmoil that he had maintained while portraying cheerful tWitch started resurfacing. The chaotic depths of his mind were not a healthy place for him to explore. The inner turmoil that had been hidden beneath his daily happiness began to surface.
According to Allison, Stephen also grew more irritable, struggled with sleep, and showed a lack of interest in work, socializing with friends, and engaging in activities he once enjoyed.
Based on Allison’s book, Stephen made a trip to investigate ayahuasca, which is known for causing intense hallucinations, distorted reality perceptions, and deep introspection. His intention was to deal with the pressures of fatherhood, confront the lack of father figures in his life, and address feelings of abandonment.
However, things didn’t go as planned, and Stephen arranged to be picked up early. Allison explained that the recommended duration for such experiences is between three to seven days, followed by weeks of supervision by the shaman. Stephen returned home after less than 12 hours and resumed work.
Allison’s account suggests that this might have worsened his situation. She wrote, “I’ve since learned that for individuals with underlying mental health issues, ayahuasca can intensify deep-seated problems. It can bring those issues to a head if there is no close supervision.”
As the ‘Dancing With the Stars’ alum put it, “Stephen was never the same after that.” She described, “The energy he gave off was different. It wasn’t joyful or generous. It was like every day he woke up on the wrong side of the bed. He wasn’t angry or mean to people; he just seemed agitated.
In “This Far,” Allison disclosed her discoveries about Stephen’s suspected drug habits. She admitted that he used marijuana, but she was surprised to find out that Stephen seemed perpetually high, even going so far as to secretly smoke on the set of Ellen. To her knowledge, no one else knew this.
Later, when going through his phone app, Allison discovered he frequented local dispensaries every night.
Following Stephen’s death in December 2022, she shared, she was selecting a pair of his favorite sneakers for his wake.
“What I uncovered went beyond shoes,” she penned. “There were sealed bags filled with psychedelic mushrooms – some were full, some half-empty, and a few contained only one or two mushrooms. There were other substances that required me to look them up on my phone. It was like a treasure trove of drugs. I was astonished.”
An autopsy obtained by TopMob News in May 2023 revealed that Stephen had no traces of drugs or alcohol in his system at the time of his passing.
Three days prior to Stephen’s suicide on Dec. 13, 2022, at the age of 40, he and Allison celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary with a trip to Laguna Beach, California.
During this weekend retreat, they talked about expanding their family, bought a shared sculpture, and she played for him a song she composed titled “Better Together.” As a gift, he presented her with a black Prada suit. Now, Allison ponders, “The queries are endless. Was the black Prada suit he gave me so I’d have something elegant to wear at his funeral? And if it was, was it a final romantic gesture from a hopeless romantic or merely a twisted move?
In the book, Allison recounts the last encounter she and her children had with Stephen before he went missing. This incident took place after they returned from dropping Maddox off at school. At the time, Stephen was conversing with their assistants and nannies before driving Weslie to class. As they left, Allison recalled saying, “See you. Love you,” without even bidding a formal goodbye.
After getting coffee from Starbucks, Stephen took Weslie to school and told the teenager, “I wish I could have been your Superman.” This statement seemed unusual, but Weslie dismissed it as one of her father’s odd moments. They exchanged ‘I love you’ before he drove away from the school parking lot, marking the last time Allison would see him in person. The fact that Stephen was already saying goodbye in his own way hours earlier still haunts her.
Later on, Stephen failed to meet Allison at the gym or office as planned but still responded to messages regarding a video shoot scheduled for the following day. That afternoon, Allison noticed his car parked in their driveway, but soon realized he wasn’t home. After attempts to contact him proved unsuccessful, Allison reached out to his assistant, brother, friend, and hospitals, eventually filing a missing persons report.
Unfortunately, police informed Allison that Stephen had taken his own life on December 13, 2022. Overwhelmed with grief, she wrote, “I raced down the hall shrieking. The sound that escaped from my throat was feral.”
Stephen’s funeral service took place in January 2023. In her book, Allison mentioned that there were aspects of the service she and his family found contentious, one of which was his family’s desire for an open casket. To accommodate both parties, a small group of immediate family members were permitted to view the open casket before it was covered for the rest of the service; no pictures or videos were allowed due to concerns they might be shared online.
Allison recalled that she required everyone who viewed the open casket to sign a nondisclosure agreement to safeguard Stephen’s privacy, which reportedly frustrated his family. “If we need NDAs,” they complained, “then everyone needs NDAs.”
As stated in the book, a funeral was conducted on the following day, followed by a Celebration of Life event where Allison, Weslie, Ellen DeGeneres, Loni Love, and Wayne Brady were among the speakers at the February memorial.
In August 2023, Dré Rose, Stephen’s brother, expressed worry in a public message about the treatment of their mother and family, which has been causing them significant distress.
In his Instagram post, Dré pointed out that this issue appears to originate from the disagreement within the family over the terms of the NDA (Non-Disclosure Agreement) presented for signing.
Dré also mentioned that Stephen’s children, Weslie, Maddox, and Zaia, have experienced limited interactions with Stephen’s relatives.
In her book, Allison revealed that members of Stephen’s family had criticized her on social media for various reasons such as handling the funeral, NDAs, and not attending a Boss family reunion she wasn’t invited to. However, she expressed understanding towards a woman who had given birth to the love of her life.
Allison denied allegations that she was keeping the children from them. Instead, she shared that she arranged for Stephen’s mom to travel from Arizona to California and back for a Grandparents’ Day event at school, facilitated FaceTime calls with the kids, and sent photos.
Furthermore, Allison claimed that someone within Stephen’s family, whom she did not name, accused her of causing his death. This person later apologized, but Allison emphasized that such words would never be forgotten.
In the book “This Far“, Allison mentioned that following Stephen’s passing, she went through his journal. It contained some passages hinting at the sexual abuse Stephen had suffered as a child, inflicted by an adult male. This traumatic experience was shared with confidence between Stephen and his friend. The friend disclosed this conversation to Allison only after Stephen had died.
Despite their prominence on TV, social media, and endorsement deals, it was widely believed that Stephen and Allison had no financial concerns. However, in her book, Allison shared a contrasting narrative. She clarified that she did not inherit Stephen’s wealth; instead, he had given away large amounts of money to relatives and friends, squandered funds on drugs and peculiar art collections. The tax burden left to her after his death amounted to $1 million, leaving both Allison and the accountant delivering the news feeling distressed.
According to Allison, the debts from paying that tax bill depleted Stephen’s accounts. Furthermore, she mentioned that Stephen’s suicide strained her business relationships, as some brands withdrew their deals, and she had to catch up on outstanding bills.
However, Allison seemed to counteract accusations of capitalizing on the book’s release for personal gain by announcing that all proceeds from the book would be donated to a mental health foundation called Move With Kindness, which she established in Stephen’s memory. In an Instagram Stories post dated January 8, 2025, Allison expressed her hope that through this foundation, we can prevent more losses due to suicide among husbands, brothers, fathers, and friends.
Ever since Stephen’s passing, I’ve felt as if his spirit lingers – even in my dreams. In a book called “This Far”, Allison shared her account of one such dream, two days after he died. She described it as a slideshow of memories, followed by darkness. Upon waking up, she was shaking and the room seemed to move around me. A face appeared, like the full moon in the night sky, morphing into three faces. Among them was Stephen’s, and he said, “I’m sorry. I love you.”
After waking from that dream, Allison shared, she felt a profound sense of peace. She wrote, “Though my husband no longer walks among us, for the first time since his death, I sensed his presence. ‘Thank you, my love,’ I whispered, ‘for being with me.’
Despite her feelings towards her late husband being complex, she acknowledged in her book’s prologue that she misses him deeply due to his good nature and significant influence on those around him. However, she doesn’t want his final decision to be romanticized or glorified. Instead, she articulated that it is possible to hate the act he chose while still loving and having empathy for him.
Throughout her book, Allison revealed how she experienced anger about his death, but at the same time, kept a place in her heart for him. She emphasized that it’s essential for her to move forward, explaining that although she no longer talks to him as frequently as she did during the first year after he passed, it is okay because she has become less tethered to him. The children and she are gradually detaching from the trauma that bound them to him. She expressed that while she believes Stephen continues to watch over them, providing comfort, she no longer depends on him in the same way as before. Instead, she trusts her own instincts more, a development she could not foresee a year ago when she saw little hope for a clear path forward.
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