tWitch's Mom Opens Up About Heartbreaking Rift With Grandkids After His Tragic Death

Stephen “tWitch” Boss’ mother wants to repair her relationship with her grandchildren.

As a lifestyle expert looking back over two years since the tragic suicide of The Ellen DeGeneres Show producer, I find myself reflecting on the subsequent challenges faced by Connie and his family, particularly his wife Allison Holker and their children Maddox (8), Zaia (6), and Wesley (16). Upon my return to California from Arizona, where I had traveled to assist with funeral arrangements in late 2022, it became apparent that the strain between us was growing.

Connie expressed during an interview with Gayle King on CBS Mornings, alongside her son Dre Rose, that their aim was to mourn together, to stand as one family because they are a family. She added that they wished to be there for the person in question, trying to understand what they wanted or needed regarding funeral arrangements.

She went on to say, “I receive a call asking you all to sign Non-Disclosure Agreements.” We responded, “Why is that necessary? What’s happening? What’s the purpose?” To which she replied, “It seems someone in our family has sold a story to a magazine.

At that point, it was claimed by Connie that Allison, who had been married to Stephen for nine years, leveled accusations against Stephen’s grandfather, suggesting he had sold a particular story.

Connie clarified, ‘If you’ve met my dad, he is highly respected and has impeccable integrity, so it’s out of character for him to engage in such actions.’ Strangely, a magazine contacted him while he was mourning. In the midst of his sorrow, he picked up the phone and answered their questions, saying that they were grieving and didn’t know what had transpired yet.

However, at that moment, she said, “It’s now ‘You are doing this, and we require your signature on this,'” but they responded, “No. That’s not accurate.” And that seemed to be the beginning. Things escalated from there.

As Connie reports, it’s been just two times that she’s come across Stephen’s children after he passed away. Yet, Connie and Dre are keeping hope alive for a reconciliation and have proposed dialogue, an offer which, as they mention, remains unanswered by Allison so far.

Dre expressed that over the past two years, it seems as though we’ve reached out, but there hasn’t been a steady response. There have been numerous instances where our messages or calls were left unanswered or ignored. To me, this inconsistency represents a change in behavior. If you can demonstrate and act with kindness, mirroring the compassionate spirit that my brother embodied – one of kindness, love, and positivity – then you can help his family heal during this difficult time, as we are also experiencing similar struggles.

During the period of alienation, the Boss family likewise voiced discontent over Allison’s memoir titled “This Far,” in which the former contestant of “So You Think You Can Dance” revealed her discoveries from Stephen’s personal journals and hinted at his suspected drug use and financial troubles.

Connie exclaimed to Gayle, ‘Wow!’ upon learning about Allison’s memoir. ‘It dawned on me that this will be accessible for the children to read,'” or simply, “Connie blurted out ‘Wow!’ to Gayle, realizing that Allison’s memoir would be readable by their kids.

Although there are strained feelings publicly, Allison expressed her hope for Connie and the rest of the Boss family to establish a bond with her children.

Allison shared with TopMob News on February 10 that Connie will remain a source of positivity and love for Maddox and Zaia. She expressed her wish for them to uphold these traditions, collaborating to honor Stephen’s legacy over the coming years.

Keep reading for more bombshells from Allison’s book…

As a devoted reader, I found myself resonating deeply with Allison Holker’s story in her book “This Far“. She recounted the moment she walked away from her church during high school, only to face harsh criticism from her community.

In her own words, “I felt I was a wretched soul unworthy of God’s love.” At seventeen, an event so harrowing transpired that it seemed to solidify the negative opinions about me within my circle.”

Allison opted to keep the specifics of the incident private, but mentioned that “the repercussions seeped into every aspect of my life.”

She continued, “An insidious whisper in my mind persisted, telling me it was my divine retribution for abandoning faith.” Reflecting on this now, I realize how disrespectful and unjustified that belief was towards God.”

Desiring to move past the ordeal, Allison chose to keep it concealed. Looking back, she admitted, “I wish I had taken a stand sooner. I empathize profoundly with those in similar predicaments who are too afraid to speak up. May my confession inspire others to find their voice.”

More recently, Allison delved deeper into her experience during an interview on the January 27th episode of “The Jamie Kern Lima Show“. She shared, “An older man exploited the vulnerability that women often face, particularly within the dance community where we hold our teachers in high regard. We trust them implicitly. Dance can be intense and even at a young age, it can be sexualized. That vulnerability was manipulated.

Allison and tWitch (Stephen Boss) didn’t actually meet during their appearances on “So You Think You Can Dance” in seasons two and four respectively. While they were both part of season seven in 2010, it was at a party five years prior, hosted by one of Allison’s dance partners from season two (Ivan Koumaev), that the pair first crossed paths. Allison shared the encounter: “A person Ivan knew from the hip-hop world introduced us at the party. ‘Hey, I’m tWitch,’ he said. ‘That’s cute,’ I replied. ‘What’s your real name?’ He admiredly appraised me, explaining that he had been in Los Angeles for a while and I was the first person who had asked him that. ‘Stephen Boss,’ he replied.” However, it wasn’t an instant love connection as Allison found tWitch’s appearance overwhelming at the time with his fishnet top, multiple piercings, dyed blond hair, and mohawk. This was too much for a Utah girl like Allison.

In retrospect, their relationship began in an unforgettable encounter – Allison pointed out that they became an official couple during a wrap party for season seven of So You Think You Can Dance. She reminisced about their early days, when Stephen was part of a dance troupe for the opening act of the Glee Live! In Concert tour. At one of his shows in Dublin, they were exploring the arena before things turned romantic.

She vividly recalled how they found themselves on the scaffolding above the stage – she didn’t explain the circumstances – and started kissing passionately. “One thing led to another,” she recounted in This Far. “We ended up caught in the act by a security guard who suddenly appeared, shone his flashlight near us, and asked, ‘Who’s up there?’ We managed to suppress our laughter until he left, then quickly got dressed and returned to the concertgoers.

2013 marked the year Allison and Stephen exchanged vows, forming a family with Weslie, born in 2008 (from Allison’s previous relationship), Maddox (born in 2016), and Zaia (born in 2019). On social media, they shared glimpses of their lives, posting videos of dance parties, Halloween costumes, and daily home life.

However, Allison speculated that social media may have added stress to Stephen’s life towards the end.

“He felt the need to portray us as the perfect family,” she wrote, “which was impractical.”

Allison believes the constant admiration Stephen received for his cheerful personality created a sense of pressure.

“As his fan base expanded rapidly, he couldn’t step out in public without being praised for his upbeat demeanor, loving seeming persona, and infectious positivity,” she wrote. “How draining it must have been for him.”

Still, Allison emphasized that the happy moments depicted in their videos were authentic.

“Stephen was traversing a complex emotional terrain,” she added. “He oscillated between genuine joy and deep sadness, switching back and forth as if his emotions were controlled by a dimmer switch.

Following 19 seasons, “The Ellen Degeneres Show” concluded in May 2022, marking a mixed emotion for Stephen who held the roles of DJ and later, executive producer. He was disheartened to depart from his secondary home but also saw it as an avenue to relinquish his deejay role and explore fresh, more ambitious opportunities, as he wrote. While he would have loved to succeed Ellen as the host, discussions with the network proved fruitless after several months. Stephen was let down, but in his characteristic manner, he framed it positively due to their busy schedule.

She further mentioned that the show’s end didn’t create instability because he still had a job. They had numerous projects underway. However, this change brought about a “rearrangement” in Stephen’s daily routine. For nine years, the show provided his days with structure and rhythm. Without a fixed schedule, Stephen found himself with more time to reflect internally. The hidden struggles he had suppressed while portraying cheerful tWitch on a regular basis began to surface.

According to Allison, Stephen also developed more impatience, lost sleep, and demonstrated a lack of enthusiasm for work, socializing with friends, and engaging in activities he previously enjoyed.

In Allison’s book, it is mentioned that Stephen made a journey to investigate ayahuasca. This ritual, led by a shaman, is known for causing intense hallucinations, distorted realities, and deep self-reflection. Stephen’s purpose was to confront the stresses of parenthood, grapple with the absence of father figures in his life, and deal with feelings of abandonment.

However, things didn’t go as planned and Stephen had a friend pick him up prematurely. Allison wrote that the ideal duration for such experiences is three to seven days, followed by weeks of supervision from the shaman. Stephen returned home after less than 12 hours and immediately plunged back into work.

This hasty return may have worsened his situation. As Allison pointed out, ayahuasca can intensify underlying mental health problems for some individuals. If not closely monitored, it can bring those issues to a head.

As the alum of “Dancing With the Stars” put it, “Stephen was never the same afterwards.” In her words, “The energy he gave off was different. It wasn’t joyful or generous. It was like every day he woke up on the wrong side of the bed. He wasn’t angry or mean to people; he just seemed agitated.

In “This Far”, Allison shared her discoveries about Stephen’s suspected drug habits. She admitted that he used marijuana, but she was unaware that Stephen was usually under the influence. Remarkably, she noticed he would secretly smoke on the set of “Ellen”. To her knowledge, this information wasn’t known by others.

Later, as she examined his phone app, Allison discovered he visited local dispensaries every night.

After Stephen’s passing in December 2022, she recounted, she was selecting a pair of his favorite sneakers for his wake. “What I found instead,” she wrote, “was far more than shoes. There were sealed bags containing psychedelic mushrooms, some full and others half-empty; some only had one or two mushrooms left. I also found other substances that I needed to look up on my phone. It was a veritable treasure trove of drugs. I was shocked.”

An autopsy obtained by TopMob News in May 2023 revealed that Stephen had no traces of drugs or alcohol in his system at the time of his death.

Three days before Stephen took his own life at the age of 40 on Dec. 13, 2022, he and Allison celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary with a trip to Laguna Beach, California.

During this weekend retreat, they talked about having more children, bought a sculpture together, and she revealed to him a song she had written titled “Better Together.” In response, he gave her a black Prada suit as a gift.

Now, Allison ponders, “The queries are countless. Did he buy me this black Prada suit so I’d have something elegant for his funeral? And if he did, was it a final romantic gesture from a hopeless romantic or merely a distorted action?

In the book, Allison narrates the final encounter between herself and Stephen, her kids, as they recall. On a particular day, following Maddox’s school drop-off, Stephen was conversing with their helpers before driving Weslie to class. Allison recalled saying “See you. Love you” as they left, not even bidding a formal goodbye.

Later on, Allison recounted that Stephen had taken Weslie to school and said something unusual, “I wish I could have been your Superman.” Although Weslie didn’t seem to ponder it much, dismissing it as a typical father’s quirk, this statement now holds a profound significance for Allison. It was the last time she would see him. The thought that Stephen had already bid farewell in his own way hours prior to his disappearance continues to haunt her.

That day, as planned, Stephen didn’t show up at the gym or office, but he did respond to messages about a video shoot scheduled for the next day. In the afternoon, Allison noticed Stephen’s car parked in their driveway, only to realize later that he wasn’t home.

Allison then recounted her efforts to reach Stephen, which went unanswered. This led her to contact his assistant, brother, friend, and hospitals, ultimately filing a missing persons report. However, the police informed Allison on December 13, 2022, that Stephen had taken his own life.

“I ran down the hall screaming,” she wrote. “The sound that escaped from my throat was primal.

The memorial service for Stephen took place in January 2023.

In her book, Allison mentioned that there were parts of the service that she and his family had disagreements about, one of which was the request from his family to have an open casket. Eventually, she allowed a small group of immediate family members to view the open casket prior to its closure for the rest of the memorial service—with the stipulation that no photos or videos could be taken due to concerns they might end up online.

“Following the advice of my lawyers,” Allison explained, “I demanded that everyone who viewed the open casket should sign a confidentiality agreement to preserve Stephen’s privacy, which caused frustration among his family.” When they responded, “If we have to sign NDAs, then everybody has to sign NDAs,” she shared.

The book mentions that a funeral occurred the following day, followed by a Celebration of Life event—at which Allison, Weslie, Ellen DeGeneres, Loni Love, and Wayne Brady were among the speakers at the memorial in February.

In August 2023, Dré Rose, Stephen’s brother, expressed worry through a message about the treatment of their mother and family, which has been deeply troubling for everyone involved.

Dré mentioned in an Instagram post that the issue appears to stem from disagreements over the original terms of the NDA (Non-Disclosure Agreement) presented to the family for signing.

Additionally, Dré pointed out that interactions between Weslie, Maddox, and Zaia with Stephen’s relatives have been significantly reduced.

Allison acknowledged in her book that members of Stephen’s family had criticized her online for various reasons, including her handling of the funeral, the NDAs, and for not attending a Boss family reunion she hadn’t even been invited to. However, she said she made an effort to understand their perspective as the mother who brought love into Stephen’s life.

Allison denied allegations that she was keeping the children from them, explaining that she arranged for Stephen’s mom to travel from Arizona to California and back for a Grandparents’ Day event at school, facilitated FaceTime calls with the kids, and even sent photos.

Furthermore, Allison accused someone in Stephen’s family (who she chose not to name) of blaming her for his death. This person later apologized, but Allison said that she would never forget those words.

In the book “This Far“, Allison mentioned that she read through Stephen’s journal following his demise. Therein, she found certain passages hinting at sexual abuse he suffered as a child, perpetrated by an adult male. This traumatic experience was shared with him in strict confidence to a friend, who revealed the conversation to her only after Stephen’s death.

Despite their high-profile dance careers and widespread popularity, it was often believed that Stephen and Allison had no financial concerns. However, Allison’s book paints a different picture. She clarified that she did not inherit wealth from Stephen, as it was largely given away, spent excessively on drugs and unusual art collections, and there was a substantial tax bill due upon his death. The accountant had to inform her of a million-dollar debt left by Stephen.

In Allison’s own words, “The money he had was spent dealing with that debt.” Furthermore, Stephen’s suicide left her in breach of contract with certain business partners, and some brands stopped collaborating with her, causing additional financial strain. She also fell behind on bills.

However, Allison seemed to address those who might accuse her of writing the book for monetary gain by stating that “All the earnings from this book will be used to fund a mental health focused foundation I established in Stephen’s memory, Move With Kindness.” In an Instagram Stories post dated January 8, 2025, she added, “My aim is to prevent the loss of more husbands, brothers, fathers, and friends to suicide.

Following Stephen’s passing, Allison has felt as though he’s still with her – even in her dreams. She described one such dream in the book ‘This Far’, stating that two days after his death, she experienced a vivid dream sequence where everything turned black. Upon waking up, she began to tremble and noticed the room seemed to be moving. A face, resembling the moon in the night sky, appeared and morphed into three faces, one of which was familiar – it was Stephen. His lips moved, and Allison could clearly hear him saying, ‘I’m sorry. I love you.’

After waking up, Allison felt a sense of tranquility wash over her. She penned down, ‘Though my husband no longer physically exists, for the first time since his death, I sensed his presence. “Thank you, my love,” I whispered, “for providing me comfort.”‘

Despite the intricate nature of her feelings, she acknowledged in her book’s preface that her emotions regarding her late husband are complex. “Reconciling my feelings,” she wrote, “is challenging because I am deeply saddened by his untimely departure as he was a genuinely good person, an exceptional husband and father who touched everyone he met positively. However, I can’t overlook the significant impact of his decision on our lives.”

Throughout the book, Allison candidly shared her struggles with anger towards Stephen’s passing while simultaneously cherishing him in her heart. “Glossing over someone who has taken their life is perilous,” she emphasized. “No one choosing this path should be idolized. It’s feasible to detest the act and have profound love and empathy for the person who made that choice. These emotions can coexist.”

She acknowledged that romanticizing someone who has ended their life is dangerous and undesirable. “It’s okay,” she wrote, “to feel intense anger towards Stephen while still admiring him immensely. Such feelings do not have to be mutually exclusive.”

However, she emphasized the importance of moving forward in her life. “I no longer communicate with Stephen as I did during the first year after he passed away,” she wrote, “and that’s acceptable. I am no longer emotionally bound to him. The children and I are gradually breaking free from the trauma that once held us captive. I believe that Stephen is watching over us, which provides me comfort. But I no longer depend on him as I once did. I trust my own judgment a lot more now. A year ago, I couldn’t envision a path forward that offered a clear view of the horizon.

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2025-02-11 19:20

tWitch’s Mom Opens Up About Heartbreaking Rift With Grandkids After His Tragic Death

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