Why Gareth Malone Disappeared: Burnout, Panic, and How Bach Helped Him Find His Voice Again

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Gareth Malone returns with an Easter chorus – but what led him to vanish for half a decade, and how was J.S. Bach instrumental in his return?

Once again, Gareth Malone is leading choral music on our screens, exhibiting his infectious enthusiasm and seemingly eternal youth. Known as the Peter Pan of Do-Re-Mi, he’s taking eight individuals who have never sung in a classical choir before, aiming to draw out classical perfection from them. In just seven weeks from their first audition, these novice singers will collaborate with the BBC National Orchestra and Chorus of Wales to perform Handel’s “Messiah” at Cardiff’s Llandaff Cathedral alongside the professional orchestra.

It seems this task is quite significant and holds great importance for the choirmaster, as he has carefully selected it. The reason behind his choice is that it’s about eight individuals interacting with Handel’s work, which appeals to him. To me, it represents a heartwarming experience. However, there’s a deeper connection: “Messiah is a text I’ve known since my childhood. My parents introduced it to me; they would sing the Hallelujah Chorus while washing dishes.

Following the experience of listening to it on vinyl, he was led to witness Handel’s most renowned oratorio being performed live. To put it simply, at around seven or eight years old, I wouldn’t want to diminish the value of television or radio, but going to the Royal Festival Hall and experiencing a grand orchestra play and a choir of 200 singers is not the same as listening to them through those mediums.

Since my youth, music has always moved me profoundly, leaving me feeling overpowered by its power. Even today, it continues to stir me deeply. Handel’s compositions originate from a heartfelt place; they’re sincere yet thoughtful, carrying an underlying sense of lightness. One gets the impression that he penned them in haste, as if guided by divine inspiration. This fervor is evident when you conduct and play his works, as it shines through the score itself.

Energy isn’t something you can extract from artificial intelligence. AI is merely a tool, just like a hammer. You wouldn’t spend all day using a hammer, would you? As a child, I grew cress in the real world. We made a sandwich with it and ate it. That was a significant experience for me because it involved doing something tangible, not just interacting through a screen.

A computer can’t perform the Hallelujah Chorus from Messiah or play in an orchestra. It’s something that requires a living organism, something authentic, emotional, and alive. Technology is valuable, but when I sit down at my piano, it’s about connecting with something tangible, something that resonates and vibrates.

Previously seen annually on our screens with popular series like “The Choir: Military Wives” and “Boys Don’t Sing,” Malone temporarily disappeared. He had discussions about his choral talents in the United States, but in 2017 opted to step down. “I was suffering from burnout. I was on a never-ending treadmill, moving from one project to another. Each one grew larger and larger, until you reached a point where you had nothing more to offer. Launching in America was a big part of that.” Then unexpectedly, the pandemic occurred.

He didn’t make any income in 2021 due to the impact of Covid-19. The initial part of the year went fine, but then suddenly, all television productions and commissioning came to a complete standstill. As a result, he found himself at home. This unexpected turn of events led him back to the daily tasks of taking care of his children, preparing their swimming gear, and cooking their dinners. Despite the challenges, he doesn’t regret this extended period of being at home because it gave him five valuable years with his family. However, one might wonder if he was concerned about public perception given that his creation, Gareth Malone, the Boyish Choral Superstar, might have been forgotten during this time.

He states unequivocally, displaying an uncommon frankness from a celebrity, “One hundred percent, absolutely.” His life, he explains, has been wholly defined by being “Gareth Malone on TV.” A pause follows. Was it a crisis? “Indeed, it was.” Did he panic? “Yes, I did. There were definitely times when I felt panicked.” How did he cope? “I leaned on my wife [English teacher Becky Malone]. That’s what partners are for,” he explains. Additionally, routine played a significant role. “I would make myself get up, put on a fresh shirt, and head to work in my studio. I would work on music and try to create new projects.” What happened next?

Instead of experiencing more anxiety, he seemed to feel a sense of panic when it seemed like everyone was engrossed in streaming platforms or iPlayer, with no one watching traditional TV. Reading Broadcast magazine only added to his unease as it often painted a grim picture. It seems that he worried about his lack of diversity – fearing he might be too white, too male, and too focused on classical programming.

In addition to his wife, another individual assisted him: the 17th-century composer Johann Sebastian Bach (Malone has chosen Bach’s St John Passion for his Easter 2024 series). “I find solace in Bach’s music. It’s flawless. He grasped sorrow and loss. Music is my sanctuary, it’s what keeps me going.” And now? “After the pandemic, things have become clearer. I’ve discovered what truly motivates me: music education and music itself.

Similar to numerous others, including the popular singer Ed Sheeran, Malone expresses concern that future generations might be deprived of musical experiences, given the lack of music education in public schools. “What’s unique about music is its ability to foster a sense of accomplishment. You practice, rehearse, and it feels like you’re making progress.

As a movie reviewer with three decades under my belt in the realm of music education, I must confess that I’ve yet to witness any significant shift in government policies that prioritize music. My heartfelt wish is that my lifelong efforts could resonate loudly and emphasize the indispensable role of music in our lives. It transcends mere entertainment; it has the power to transform lives, acting as a profound force for change. Music, in essence, is not an optional extra, but a vital component of our very humanity.

In this very location we spoke about how Cardiff University had shuttered its School of Music, a fact revealed during our filming here. It’s truly disheartening, considering some of the Welsh Chorus members were students there. For years, their music echoed globally. Now, it seems that crucial juncture is upon us.

It’s common knowledge that becoming a musician requires dedication and years of experience. Yet, we’re facing a mental health crisis. Why isn’t music more actively promoted? Instead of waiting for problems to arise, why not provide a violin and inspire a young person to play? Couldn’t we make the lives of our youth more enjoyable and fulfilling before they face crises? No one recalls doing math on Thursdays. However, everyone remembers the times they sang in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

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2025-04-15 03:39