😩 Crypto Kings and QueensITCH H&; Lo – Wealth Flight Out of California

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Once upon a tax,
in the sunny climes of California,
where the air is as thick as treacle with tech tycoons and crypto wizards, a new plan had everyone buzzing louder than a symphony of bees.
They called it the 2026 California Billionaire Tax Act. Not to be outdone by Cinderella’s fairy godmother, this financial game-changer would slap a hefty 5% tax on anyone whose riches soared over the one billion-dollar line.

Imagine, if you will, a tangle of billionaires fidgeting with their velvet ropes and tailcoats, bewildered by this sudden plot twist. Crypto and business cuddle-bears were up in arms, barking about potential capital flight that might see them swishing their money beyond the Golden State’s borders.
“Ah, brothers and sisters,” howls Jesse Powell from the windswept tower of his digital empire, Kraken. “Once tax collectors start mucking around in our cookies, there’ll be pandemonium! Picture this: all the money milling about, skittering like ants from their hill!”
Oh, dear! Far worse, they warn, entrepreneurs might juggle their assets into a frenzy and, in a Cinderella-like dash, scramble out of California before the ball even starts.

But critics aren’t just buzzing bees and jumbles; they point at Norway, with their tax escapade, where the fabulously wealthy filmmakers and diamond-touting merchants packed their bags quicker than the finale of a bad puppet show. Was this tax wizardry really pulling rabbits out of hats, or just a squib that fizzled to the floor?

One must tread carefully in <|article|> when Rosy Reporter et al., from the SEIU United Healthcare Workers West, call out for financial hoses to drench California’s dry healthcare forests. They whisper dreams of funded hospitals and classrooms sprinkled with fairy dust, where teachers dance and students sing along until their sweet voices tire.

Sigh, Well, it seems some lucky leaves are fluttering away. Peter Thiel, one of the stealthy tech titans, is pondering a proper escape to locales more friendly with their pockets, while Google’s Co-Founder, Larry Page, is setting up tents under Florida’s sun, claiming it’s a breezy fifty shades more pleasant.

Theoretically speaking, if this taxing fable comes true, Page might have to cough up some serious beans, perhaps a whopping 12 billion dollars. No joke, Thiel could be paying more than 1.2 billion before he wrinkles his nose at this tale. Ouch! But worry not, this story’s not finished just yet. The debate swirls and dances, bringing forth more characters in this unfolding saga of wealthy waltzes and tax tumbles in California.

Indeed, while some northern states fling open their gates to digital coin doodles and hiccup-free blockchain parties, California’s gold is tinged with a bittersweet risk. As voters shuffle their carpets and prepare to decide things everyone is grumbly about in 2026, one wonders: will they bring out the tap shoes or just moan about taxes?

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2025-12-29 09:09