Bitcoin’s Party Crashes: ETFs Flush $500M While Bulls Pray to $80K Fairy! 🚨💸

Bitcoin’s price is chilling near $89K like a teenager avoiding chores, while its spot ETFs are bleeding cash faster than a Black Friday sale at a vampire-themed mall. 🧛‍♂️💸

The Great $450M Fire Sale 🚨

  • BTC Chart: More Bearish Than a Vegan Steakhouse 🐻🐮
  • Auditioning for a Horror Movie 🎬👻

    Daily BTC charts are throwing a bearish temper tantrum, complete with a “Bearish Flag of Doom ™️” since October. If BTC breaks below $85.22K-a level that’s historically been a safety net for bulls-get ready for a panic-buy alert at $80K. Bears, meanwhile, are sharpening their pitchforks. 🐻🔪

    Breaking this flag could also confirm a “Reverse Cup and Handle” pattern, which sounds like a failed Starbucks drink. Bulls need to conquer $91.415K (a Fibonacci level that’s basically astrology for traders) to spark a rally. Until then, BTC is stuck in purgatory. 🧮🔮

    Stay tuned for the next thrilling episode of Trading With the Walking Dead. 📺🧟

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    2025-12-22 13:53