Well, well, well, folks! Seems like our beloved crypto mining stocks have decided to put on a lovely show of downward spirals for the second day in a row. 🌪️ Meanwhile, the tech stocks are having a reunion, because who doesn’t love a good comeback story after a little drama involving an AI model that made the world’s smartest chipmakers wet their circuits?
Riot Platforms (RIOT) is down 4.37% as of Jan. 28, just when you thought they couldn’t get any more riotous. Cleanspark (CLSK) decided to take a 2.47% plunge, while MARA Holdings (MARA) has the audacity to dip only 0.14%. Bravo to that one; always be overachieving, darling! 🥳
NVDA Takes the Trophy for Biggest Bounce
So Chipmaker Nvidia (NVDA) waltzed in and pulled a *phoenix from the ashes* move, climbing over 8.8% after a dramatic 17% fall on Jan. 27. Someone call the drama school, because this performance is Oscar-worthy! 🎭
Meanwhile, our crypto miners are apparently trying their hand at running AI models instead of harvesting bitcoins. Why mine Bitcoin, you ask? Well, maybe because mining it is becoming harder than deciphering your grandmother’s handwriting. 🤷♂️
Call in the robots! 🤖
In a much brighter turn of events on Jan. 28, Apple (AAPL) is up 3.65% — they must have learned a thing or two from the NVDA saga. Amazon (AMZN) is up 1.16%, and Meta Platforms (META) is feeling the love with a 2.17% gain. Even Microsoft (MSFT) woke up on the right side of bed, adding 2.87%. Wow, is this a group therapy session or a stock market? 😂
The S&P 500 celebrated with one of its biggest cap gains in history. And who knew stocks could throw parties? “The S&P 500 closes +55 points higher and is now just 1% from reaching a new all-time high,” according to The Kobessi Letter, probably dancing with joy at this moment.
Decline of the AI Crypto Tokens: The Sad Saga Continues
In what could only be described as an epic tragedy, AI-related crypto tokens have faced further losses like it’s their only job. The market cap fell by a staggering 5.11% to $42.33 billion. Who knew numbers could have such a dramatic flair?
Venice Token (VVV) has taken the lead in this sad story, plummeting by 20.29% — nice try, VVV! Virtuals Protocol (VIRTUALS) followed closely with a dip of 11.75%. Truly, this is the kind of excitement that keeps your heart racing, or maybe just makes you want to cry into your popcorn. 🍿
And while Bitcoin (BTC) hovers frustratingly close to that sweet, sweet $100,000 level, speculation runs rampant that the Federal Open Market Committee won’t shower us with interest rate cuts by Jan. 29. All the crypto enthusiasts are collectively holding their breaths, hoping for the best. According to CME FedWatch, there’s a 99.5% chance the Fed keeps its rates steady at 4.25% to 4.50%. Don’t hold your breath, but maybe just a little gasp might be justified? 😅
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2025-01-29 06:56