How Much Is Your Altcoin REALLY Worth? Spoiler: Prepare to Be Less Impressed

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In the vast, bewildering universe of cryptocurrency, one hero rises above the madness like a particularly stubborn cat refusing to be herded: Samson Mow, the Bitcoiner who’s taken to Twitter to explain why your “shiny altcoin” is probably just a glorified Beanie Baby.

Samson, armed with nothing but math and caffeine, pointed out that even if the biggest altcoins magically shrank their billions or trillions of coins to the neat, tidy 21 million figure Bitcoin flaunts like a badge of honor, Bitcoin would still reign supreme. Why? Because altcoins are exploiting something called the unit bias — the sneaky psychological trick where a lower price per coin fools unsuspicious humans into thinking, “Hey, that’s a bargain!” when in reality they’re just buying slightly smaller glittery rocks.

Take a deep breath: if you strip away this crusty veneer of bias, XRP should be priced around $5,800 per coin, SOL at $3,400, and ETH a cool $9,200. That’s not a typo. Mow’s basically taken the market caps of these altcoins, divided by Bitcoin’s sacrosanct 21 million coins, and flipped the whole game on its head.

“No way XRP is worth $5,800”

Yes, you read that right. According to Samson’s wonderfully complicated algebra, Ethereum is like that posh yacht in the harbor commanding a $9,200 price per coin, while in reality everyone’s just paying for a dinghy version with billions of pieces stuck together.

He perfectly sums it up: “Instead of buying that one twenty-one millionth of Etherium, you could buy just 0.11 BTC.” Translation: those tiny fractions of Bitcoin might be the golden ticket while altcoins create illusions with their bazillions of tokens confusing everyone.

Those numbers are calculated by taking the market cap of the alts and dividing by 21 million, thus framing their supply in terms of Bitcoin supply.

ETH: $193B market cap / 21M = $9,200

Instead of buying that one twenty-one millionth of Etherium, you could buy just 0.11 BTC.

— Samson Mow (@Excellion) April 19, 2025

And before you start dreaming of XRP Lambos, Samson wants you to abruptly come back to earth: “No way these alts are worth that much.” 🚀🙃

In Other News: What Do You Call a Twenty-One Millionth of a Coin? Samson Has Some Ideas

In a world where measuring minuscule bits of Bitcoin is apparently a thing, Samson suggests we need a new cosmic word for one twenty-one millionth of any cryptocurrency. Currently, 10 Sats (shorthand for Satoshis, the smallest Bitcoin unit) are called a Finney, named after that legendary Bitcoin cowboy Hal Finney. But because nobody asks for 10 Sats on a coffee run, why not use that charming “Finney” label for the elusive 1/21-millionth coin bit?

Just thinking that we need a better name for one twenty-one millionth.

We should use Finney for that. Right now it’s uncommon, but a Finney defined as 10 sats — I bet you didn’t even know that. No one needs a unit for 10 sats. But we do need an easy way to refer to 1/21…

— Samson Mow (@Excellion) April 19, 2025

Apparently, this naming spree isn’t exclusive to Bitcoin; Samson envisions Finneys for ETH, gold, and maybe your grandma’s antique collection. Just to give you some bragging rights, one Finney of Bitcoin would be worth $85,000 (today’s fantasy price), ETH’s Finney at $9,200, and gold’s Finney at a casual $1,000,000. Fancy sounding, isn’t it? Now the blockchain nerds can argue whether to drink tea or coffee while debating if that’s a brilliant idea or just another clever way to sound smarter on Twitter.

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2025-04-19 12:59