The U.S. dollar has plunged to its lowest point in three years, and lo and behold, the markets are starting to sweat. As the global economic storm brews under the weight of President Donald Trump’s new tariffs, he decides to throw another log on the fire with a remark that sends shockwaves across the financial world: “He who has the gold makes the rules.” Oh, the audacity!
What happens next? Gold skyrockets to unprecedented heights, and Bitcoin, like a rebellious child finally showing its potential, climbs to its highest levels in weeks. The world, it seems, is playing Trump’s game now. 🍿
Trump: “He Who Has the Gold Makes the Rules”
It was only over the weekend that Trump, in his infinite wisdom, dropped his philosophical gem on Truth Social: “He who has the gold makes the rules.” In the midst of a nervous market, he just couldn’t resist a little more tension. Thanks, Trump.
Immediately after this cryptic proclamation, gold hits an all-time high of $3,350, surging 1.5% in a single day (because why not?), while Bitcoin, ever the overachiever, also rises by 4%, landing at a dazzling $87,500. It’s like a scene from a financial thriller, but with fewer explosions and more spreadsheets. 💥📊
Some experts, who clearly enjoy their job as conspiracy theorists, suggest that Trump’s comments about gold might just be his way of countering China’s big-girl move into the gold market. Just last February, China bought 50 tons of the shiny metal—clearly hoarding it like a dragon guards its treasure. 🐉💰
As if on cue, crypto analyst Crypto Rover, probably sipping his overpriced coffee in a dark corner somewhere, proposed the wild idea that the U.S. should sell its gold stash and buy Bitcoin instead. Because, why not? The more absurd the suggestion, the more likely it is to stir the pot.
Dollar Drops as Fear Around Fed Grows
As gold and Bitcoin go full rocket mode, the U.S. dollar decides it’s time for a little vacation and drops to a three-year low. This sudden dive coincides with the mounting fear that Trump might actually go ahead and get rid of Federal Reserve Chairman Jerome Powell. I mean, who doesn’t love a good plot twist, right?
Apparently, Trump might want to control monetary policy like a puppet master, pulling the strings behind the scenes. Traders, naturally, freak out and begin dumping dollars. A classic case of the market panicking over a possible power grab. 🙄
Bitcoin Breaks Its Old Pattern
But hold on! Here’s the real kicker. Bitcoin does something unexpected this time around. Usually, when the dollar takes a nosedive, Bitcoin tends to follow suit. But not today! Today, Bitcoin, like the rebellious teenager it is, decides to align itself with gold. Is Bitcoin finally getting the respect it deserves as a safe-haven asset? Could this be the start of something revolutionary, or just another passing trend? Only time will tell. ⏳
However, some anonymous crypto analysts (Zerohedge, who are definitely not living in their mom’s basement) are calling this a “regime shift” in how Bitcoin behaves. Bold words, indeed. As of now, Bitcoin is trading at $87,470, reflecting a nearly 3% rise, with its market cap soaring to $1.73 trillion. The crypto world is, quite literally, on fire. 🔥💸
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2025-04-21 09:55