If you thought your uncle’s stamp collection was impressive, wait till you meet Metaplanet of Japan. These money-wizards went shopping and picked up 555 extra Bitcoins as casually as you or I would scoop up a bag of jellybeans. Now, their digital treasure chest overflows with 5,555 BTC — which at last scan, was worth a gobsmacking $536 million. Enough to make a dragon jealous. 🐉
On the fateful day of May 7, amid sakura blossoms and the odd vending machine, the Tokyo-listed firm let slip: “Oh, we just spent $53.4 million on 555 more Bitcoin. No biggie.” (This, by the way, means each Bitcoin cost roughly $96,134. Oof.) Simon Gerovich, the boss in question, confirmed their grand total acquisition so far: 5,555 Bitcoins, only $481.5 million spent in total, averaging out at a cool $86,672 per coin. If only chocolate coins appreciated like that.
To finance these wild shopping sprees, Metaplanet went all Wonka and started handing out $25 million worth of zero-coupon ordinary bonds — basically IOUs with a mysterious flavor. Since the dawn of 2024, they’ve rounded up over 35 billion yen (that’s $244 million for the non-mathemagicians) by flinging out bonds and stock acquisition rights with their pal, Evo Fund.
Their secret formula for success? Something called “BTC Yield” which isn’t a magic bean, but might as well be: 309.8% in Q4 2024, 95.6% in Q1 2025, and, just to keep things spicy, 21% this quarter. Who’s counting? Metaplanet, apparently.
“In Japanese, the number 5 is pronounced ‘Go,’ so today we’re shouting: Go go go go — to the moon and beyond!” chimed Mr. Gerovich on X, evidently not missing a chance to turn business statements into cosmic catchphrases. 🚀🌕
Metaplanet Jumps the Pacific – USA, Hide Your Bitcoins!
As if being Bitcoin Big Bosses of Asia wasn’t enough, on May 1, Metaplanet decided to plant a flag in Florida and hatch a US subsidiary: Metaplanet Treasury. The plan? Raise up to $250 million to buy even more Bitcoin and see how many records they can break before Wall Street runs out of popcorn.
They already rank as Asia’s largest publicly listed Bitcoin collector, and 11th in the world (Yes, there’s a leaderboard; no, there’s no actual trophy. Yet.).
Let’s review April’s shopping list: 696 BTC in early April for $67 million, then a cheeky 330 more for $28.2 million mid-month (that’s $85,605 per BTC, for those doing their sums). That landed them at 4,855 BTC. By April 24, they raided the piggy bank again for another 145 BTC at $13.4 million, bringing the stash to a magical 5,000.
All this sent their shares shooting up 11% by lunchtime on the Tokyo exchange, presumably while investors high-fived and confetti rained from the ceiling. 🎉💸
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2025-05-07 11:26