In the strange, whipple-scrumptious world of social media, a fantastic flutter occurred: Truth Social, that peculiar playground owned by the one and only Donald Trump, found itself at the center of a memecoin muddle. Yes, truly! The internet grapevine had begun to whisper that a brand-spanking-new memecoin was brewing in the Truth Social cauldron.
But – BANG! – out burst an official post from Truth Social, like a jack-in-the-box with its pants on fire: “Contrary to rumors, Truth Social is not launching a memecoin.” No golden tickets. No dancing Oompa Loompas. Just a stern digital wag of the finger from the Trump Media & Technology chocolate factory itself, helmed by Mr. Trump, whose stash of company shares could squash Snozzcumber sales for a lifetime.
Meanwhile, Donald Trump Jr. (the elder heir of Lord Tweet-a-Lot himself) sprang onto X with the subtlety of a whoopee cushion: “There’s no truth whatsoever about Truth Social launching a memecoin. Don’t be fooled by false information people are circulating.” Quick, someone fetch the BFG; rumor giants are on the loose!
The hullabaloo started when Ran Neuner, a crypto-influencer and full-time mischief-maker with a podcast called Crypto Banter, gleefully tweeted that a Truth Social token was set to burst forth in the next 72 hours, alleged to be whipped up by the same rapscallions responsible for the TRUMP token. CryptoMoon tried to track him down for answers but received only the sound of a distant, echoing munch of everlasting gobstoppers.
Trump Tosses His Hat (and Maybe a Golden Ticket?) Into Crypto Candyland
Now, President Trump – whose fondness for shiny things rivals the Greedy Gremlins of Guzzle Street – is far from a stranger to crypto-cookie jars. He’s already concocted his own TRUMP token, while Melania served up a MELANIA token with a flourish (possibly sprinkled with a dash of glittering sarcasm).
Alas, not all is rosy in the meme garden. The Prez found himself wobbling atop a controversy after inviting the top TRUMP token collectors to an extravagant gala dinner on May 22. Critics, including senators (who clearly don’t appreciate a good party), fanned themselves in fury and muttered about “impeachment” – one wonders if they’d accept golden tickets.
As if this weren’t a big enough gobstopper, a rumbling Bloomberg report claimed most of the TRUMP tokens weren’t even nestled in American pockets. Lawmakers clutched their pearls, startled to learn that crypto travels faster than Augustus Gloop to a chocolate river.
Here’s a lick of the numbers: 220 mysterious wallets stuffed with over 13.7 million TRUMP tokens (worth about $174 million at the last lick), and some even bearing enchanting names like “Sun” and “elon.”
TRUMP tokens once soared high and giddy at $73.43 a pop (that made even Grandpa Joe fall out of bed), but lately, they’ve tumbled down the beanstalk by over 80%. Still, in an astonishing twist of fate (and perhaps a whiff of magic beans), the token has wiggled up nearly 14% in the past week, now shimmering at $12.52 per token.
Whether it’s all smoke, mirrors, or Wonka-vapor, only time will tell. Until then, hold onto your top hats and keep your sweets close!
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2025-05-13 08:42