Elon Musk’s xAI joins prediction market—what could possibly go wrong? 🎲🤖

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Elon Musk’s xAI teams up with Kalshi to predict everything—because nothing says fun like betting on the future! 😅

In what some might call a brilliant stroke of genius—or a minor catastrophe—Kalshi, that charming prediction market platform, has decided to cozy up with Elon Musk’s latest obsession, xAI, because who doesn’t want a little AI to tell us whether the stock market will crash or their favorite team will win? 📉🏆

Apparently, their grand plan is to make the betting experience smarter, more *insightful*, and probably a tad more Orwellian. The models, lovingly trained on data from Musk’s social media playground, X, will now help traders decipher whether the central bank’s rate decision is a sign of economic doom or just another day of financial jazz. The Bloomberg report says it all sounds very impressive—until you realize it’s just a fancy way to make predicting political races seem like a walk in the park.

“There’s deep alignment between prediction markets, social media, and AI,” said Tarek Mansour, possibly while stifling a chuckle. “Prediction markets capture what people know—AI scales what people can know,” he added, hinting that soon, the machines might know more about betting than humans do. 🙃

Both clever companies are throwing engineering resources at the project, because what’s better than investing heavily in a Unicorn that might just predict your future bankruptcy?

Kalshi’s recent ventures

Meanwhile, Kalshi is making friends in high places—like with Robinhood Derivatives—hoping to bring prediction markets into everyday trading. Expect markets about politics, money, and sports to become as common as your Aunt Shirley’s gossip — because who doesn’t want to bet on the next election or whether the local baseball team will actually win a game? 🥴

This partnership also reveals the deep political ties of these tech giants—they’ve got Trump Jr. as an adviser and former regulators on their boards, because what’s a modern startup without a little political intrigue? xAI even managed to poach Kalshi’s former general counsel to boss around Musk’s regulatory department. Smooth moves all around.

And just when you thought it couldn’t get more surreal, Musk announced Microsoft Azure will host xAI’s Grok models, pushing the little AI engine further into our lives. It’s like saying, “Hey, we’re watching,” but in a friendly, Silicon Valley kind of way. 🎩

So here we are—another step closer to a future where AI, finance, and politics are so intertwined you’ll need a degree in quantum physics just to place a bet. Cheers to progress, or whatever this is.

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2025-05-20 20:30