Judge Says “Oops!” in $110 Million Mango Markets Fiasco 🍑💸
In a twist befitting the most dramatic of novels, a US federal judge, the esteemed Arun Subramanian, has decided to play the role of the benevolent hero, casting aside the fraud and manipulation convictions against our protagonist, Avraham Eisenberg. Yes, the very same Eisenberg, who, in the eyes of many, was the villain of the $110 million Mango Markets saga.
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View Urgent ForecastOn a fateful Friday, the judge, with a flourish of his gavel, declared that the evidence presented was as flimsy as a poorly constructed plot twist. “Insufficient,” he proclaimed, as if he were critiquing a lackluster performance at the local theater. The jury’s verdict, it seems, was not quite the masterpiece they had hoped for.
In a dramatic turn of events, Judge Subramanian vacated Eisenberg’s convictions for commodities fraud and market manipulation, as if he were erasing the missteps of a wayward character in a grand tale. He even acquitted him of a third charge, leaving the courtroom buzzing with disbelief. “Mango Markets was permissionless and automatic,” the judge noted, as if to say, “How could one possibly manipulate such a free-spirited platform?”
Yet, let us not forget the irony that lingers in the air like a poorly timed punchline. This ruling comes on the heels of Eisenberg’s four-year prison sentence for a rather different, and far more serious, charge involving child sexual abuse material (CSAM). Ah, the complexities of human nature! One moment a hacker, the next a cautionary tale.
As the dust settles on this courtroom drama, one can only wonder what the next chapter holds for our enigmatic character. Will he rise like a phoenix from the ashes of his past, or will he remain a footnote in the annals of financial misadventures? Only time will tell.
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2025-05-24 13:56