Smarter Web Buys 225 BTC, Proves They’re Either Geniuses or Just Really Into Memes 🤔

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  • Smarter Web Adds 225 Bitcoin, Because Apparently, They’ve Decided the Future Is Less About Websites and More About Crypto. 🚀
  • CEO Declares Bitcoin the “Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread,” Then Probably Toasted Some While Planning More Purchases. 🍞
  • Company Keeps £1M Cash Handy for Future Bitcoin Splurges, Because Who Needs Sleep When You Can Have Crypto Drama? 😴💸

The Smarter Web Company has once again flexed its financial muscles in a way that would make even Midas raise an eyebrow. The UK-based web design firm—yes, they still do websites—announced it has added 225 more Bitcoin to its already bulging digital wallet. This move aligns with their so-called “10-Year Plan,” which seems less like a strategy and more like the plot of a fantasy novel where Bitcoin is the One Ring. The announcement was made on their official X account, because apparently, even tweets are now worth their weight in gold… or Bitcoin. 🐦✨

CEO Calls Bitcoin the Beyoncé of Assets, Plans to Keep Buying Like It’s Black Friday 🛒

The company forked out an average of $118,076 per Bitcoin (because why not?), spending a whopping total of $26.25 million. With this latest acquisition, Smarter Web now boasts a treasury of 1,825 Bitcoin. That’s right, folks—nearly two thousand reasons to question whether they’re running a web design business or auditioning for a crypto heist movie. 💼🎬

This isn’t their first rodeo, either. Back in July, they splashed out on 325 Bitcoin, dropping around £27.15 million ($36.45 million). Clearly, Smarter Web isn’t just dipping its toes into the Bitcoin pool; they’re cannonballing in with the enthusiasm of a toddler at a waterpark. 🏊‍♂️💦

CEO Andrew Webley explained their obsession with Bitcoin by saying it’s “the best asset the world has ever had.” Bold words, Andrew, especially coming from someone who probably started their career designing websites for local bakeries. He went on to say that owning Bitcoin helps preserve the company’s wealth for future use—a statement that might sound noble if it weren’t delivered with all the subtlety of a dragon hoarding treasure. 🐉💰

And just in case you thought they were all-in on Bitcoin, don’t worry—they’ve kept about £1 million ($1.3 million) in cash reserves. Why? So they can buy EVEN MORE Bitcoin when the time is right. Truly, these people have mastered the art of moderation. 🙄

Oh, and let’s not forget: Smarter Web is technically a web design and online marketing company. They build websites, host them, and help clients advertise their businesses online. But honestly, between the Bitcoin obsession and the cryptic financial reports, one has to wonder if they’re secretly training to become wizards instead of web developers. 🧙‍♂️💻

Company Claims Bitcoin Strategy Yields 43,000% Year-to-Date, Which Sounds Made Up but Isn’t 📈

Despite their bold Bitcoin adventures, Smarter Web’s latest financial report shows a loss of approximately £719,566 as of April 30, 2025. Yes, you read that correctly—a loss. But fear not, dear reader, because the company insists everything is A-OK. Since going public, they’ve raised over £100 million, carry no debt (except for a small director’s loan, which has been repaid), and claim their Bitcoin plan is working like a charm. Charm being the operative word, of course. ✨😏

According to Smarter Web, their Bitcoin holdings have yielded a staggering 43,000% return year-to-date. In the past 30 days alone, they’ve seen a 189% increase. These numbers are so absurdly high they make lottery winners look like amateurs. If nothing else, this proves that Smarter Web is either incredibly smart or incredibly lucky. Or possibly both. 🍀📈

Moving forward, the company plans to keep expanding its Bitcoin treasury while also growing its web services. Presumably, this means they’ll be designing websites for other companies that want to get rich quick—or at least pretend to. Either way, Smarter Web seems determined to straddle the line between traditional business and futuristic finance, like a tightrope walker juggling flaming torches. 🔥🤹‍♀️

In conclusion, Smarter Web is no longer just a web company. It’s morphing into something entirely new: part web designer, part crypto enthusiast, and part existential experiment. Whether this will end in triumph or tragedy remains to be seen, but one thing is certain—they’re giving us all a story worth watching. Popcorn, anyone? 🍿👀

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2025-07-26 04:05