Ah, good sirs and madames, gather ’round and lend your attentive ears! For lo, upon the stage of CNBC, Monsieur Michael Saylor, that most enterprising co-founder and grand poobah of Strategy, has, with confidence befitting a man who sees numbers in his sleep, declared a prophecy most bold: Bitcoin-yes, that elusive, capricious sprite-shall ascend by thirty percent each annum, and for twenty years! Mon dieu, even Molière’s Harpagon blushes at such audacity 💸.
His thesis, as crisp as his waistcoat, revolves about the magic of 21 million coins-no more, no less-and their global habitation. A statement both brief and bombastic. Truly, brevity is the soul of hyperbole!
Saylor’s Long-Term Farce
Ever since 2020, Saylor has bet Strategy’s fortune on Bitcoin, much as Alceste bet his patience on Célimène’s love. The proof lies in those ever-swelling coffers-226,000 BTC, most assuredly more than any miser’s hoard.
Upon the digital gossip-monger X, Saylor hath proclaimed, “Bitcoin is on Sale!” paired artfully with a chart of acquisition, inciting investors to don their purchasing hats and speculate wildly. 🤔
His calculus: rarity plus adoption equals price ascension! Some call it persuasive. Others call it an act worthy of Scapin.
MICHAEL SAYLOR SAYS LIVE ON CNBC THAT #BITCOIN WILL GO UP 30% A YEAR FOR THE NEXT 20 YEARS
JUST THE BEGINNING
-The Bitcoin Historian (@pete_rizzo_) August 24, 2025
Analysts And Their Comic Discord
The chorus of analysts, never content to applaud in unison, present both mild agreement and outlandish dissent. Witness Bitcoin Hopium, who, like Don Juan, promises delights impossible; to wit, 100% gains per year. To which others respond, “Why not promise the moon as well, provided it’s scarce?” 🚀
Skeptics, those wary Cassandras, wave their hands at volatility, regulatory bogeymen, and the grand impossibility of market fortune-telling in the style of Monsieur Jourdain’s philosophers. Admirers retort that treasuries and grand institutions will steady the vessel-when pigs fly, perhaps.
Monsieur Saylor’s post and chart were dissected by investors much as Orgon’s fortune by Tartuffe. Past signals have led to eager buying, first in shadow and then with the fanfare of trumpets. Strategy’s machinations sway the crowd, and mayhap, the market’s humors.
Elsewhere, across the mighty seas in Japan, Metaplanet, a publicly listed company, did abscond with 103 BTC at a price that makes even Harpagon squint-some $11.7 million tossed with flourish! A successful binge, netting them 18,991 BTC. Such accumulation earns one a place on the list, if not in the annals of excess. Brava, Metaplanet! 🇯🇵💰
a high-flying executive spouted a prophecy, a digital signal was sent, and a company in the Land of the Rising Sun added Bitcoin aplenty. Whether this ends in jubilation or farce shall be revealed anon, as investors chatter over their goblets and attempt divination in their ledgers. Act 2 awaits, with much ado about Bitcoin! 🎭
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2025-08-25 17:29