Bitcoin: Still Waiting for Godot? 🤪

by

Markets

What to know:

  • The Federal Reserve coughed, and Bitcoin… did absolutely nothing! Oy vey!
  • Bitcoin’s MACD is doing a little dance, maybe a bullish one, maybe not. Who knows?!
  • ETF flows? Don’t even ASK. It’s sad, really sad. 😭

This technical analysis is brought to you by CoinDesk’s Omkar Godbole, a man who spends his days staring at charts. Bless his heart.

The Fed had their little pow-wow, and Bitcoin just shrugged. A whole 25 basis points! Such drama! They tried to sound tough, but the dollar went south anyway. Honestly, you can’t make this stuff up!

And BTC? Still boring traders to tears. It’s like watching paint dry… very expensive paint, but drying nonetheless.

On the chart, it’s the same old story. A little up, a little down, stuck in a channel. My grandmother has more exciting price action in her stamp collection.

A trader with half a brain will tell ya-break above that trendline, and maybe there’s hope. Fall below that little up-channel, and we’re all in trouble. Simple, right? Don’t tell the hedge funds!

Now, the MACD… it’s turning green! A flicker of hope? Perhaps! But don’t go spending your shekels yet. It could be a mirage!

The dollar, that old nemesis, is taking a beating. The Fed said “hawk”, the market said “nah”. It’s a beautiful mess. A weaker dollar usually means good things for crypto. Usually. 🙄

And guess what? The dollar’s MACD is turning down. Double whammy! But don’t get too excited-it’s a conspiracy, I tell ya!

Nasdaq’s doing well, which, theoretically, is good for Bitcoin. But the relationship? It’s… complicated. Like a bad marriage. Bitcoin falls harder, but doesn’t climb as high. What a mooch!

The sellers are tired, at least. Bitcoin’s holding steady, even with bad news about that crypto bill in the Senate. A minor victory, I suppose.

If it does go up, watch out for those resistance levels. $97,000, $108,000… all looking very profitable for someone.

But here’s the kicker: those ETF inflows… where are they?! We’re talking less than $500 million a day. A pittance! October and November were a bloodbath of redemptions. Oy gevalt!

So look, Nasdaq is fine, but Bitcoin is just tagging along for the ride. And a ride down may still happen. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.

A breakdown below that little channel? $80,000 is where we’re going. Prepare yourselves! And maybe invest in a good therapist. You’ll need it.

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2025-12-12 10:34