Ah, behold the grand spectacle of Bitcoin, that fickle mistress of the markets, who, after a most precipitous fall beneath the lofty summit of $75,000, hath rebounded with all the grace of a clown tripping over his own feet. Yet, alas! Her ascent was halted at the threshold of $79,000, where she now lingers, as if pondering her next folly.
In this theater of financial absurdity, Hyperliquid (HYPE) and its companion, CC, have taken center stage, their gains as notable as a buffoon’s antics at a royal court. Meanwhile, the other grandees of the crypto realm-those larger-cap alts-remain as sluggish as a philosopher lost in his own thoughts.
Bitcoin’s Caper at $79K
What a week it hath been for our primary cryptocurrency! Last Wednesday, she flirted with the heights of $90,000, only to be rebuffed by the stern hand of the US Fed, who, in their wisdom, paused the interest rate cuts. And lo, the descent began, gradual yet inexorable, like a tragic hero marching to his doom.
The tensions in the Middle East, that ever-present specter of chaos, were blamed for Thursday’s dramatic crash, when Bitcoin slumped to a multi-month low of $81,000. A brief rebound followed, as if the market had momentarily remembered its purpose, but the weekend brought fresh woes, as Bitcoin crumbled from $83,000 to $76,000-a most unseemly performance for a Saturday evening.
Sunday saw a fleeting recovery, but Monday’s crash to under $75,000 was the final act in this tragicomedy, the lowest point since the days of yore (April last year, to be precise). Though she hath since bounced back, challenging $79,000 once more, she remains shackled below it, her market cap diminished to $1.560 trillion, and her dominance over the alts a mere 57.7%.
HYPE’s Grand Parade
The larger-cap alts, those faithful companions of Bitcoin, have largely followed her lead in this downward spiral. Ethereum, once the proud heir to the crypto throne, hath been struck with particular ferocity, plummeting from over $3,000 to a mere $2,100. Though it hath since rebounded, it struggles still below $2,300, a shadow of its former self.
XRP, TRX, and XLM find themselves slightly in the red, while SOL, BNB, ADA, and BCH have managed gains so insignificant, they scarcely merit mention. But ah, HYPE! That mischievous upstart hath stolen the show once more, surging by 19% to $37. And let us not forget CC, the other darling of the day, with an 8% pump to over $0.19.
The total crypto market cap, ever the optimist, hath regained $70 billion since yesterday’s low, now standing above $2.7 trillion. Yet, one cannot help but wonder: is this but a fleeting interlude in a grander farce?
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2026-02-03 13:35