Let’s face it, Bitcoin’s been acting like a grumpy teenager lately-all lower highs and lower lows. But hey, even grumpy teens have their moments of brilliance. The recent uptick has nudged BTC back toward its lower-high region, which is about as exciting as watching paint dry… unless it breaks out. Then, my friends, we might just have a party. 🎉
Thus, margin-based spot trading-once the exclusive vice of offshore renegades-was dragged kicking and screaming into the fluorescent-lit bureaucracy of U.S. derivatives markets. How very… civilized. 🎩
The institutional world, a place generally best avoided by anyone with a functioning sense of self-preservation, has decided it wants a piece of the Solana action. Franklin Templeton, custodians of a truly bewildering $1.6 trillion (that’s a lot of zeroes, folks 🤔), have announced the launch of the Franklin Solana ETF. Because, apparently, what the world really needs is another way to indirectly participate in the digital whims of the internet.
Ju, ever the chart wizard, whipped up a composite on-chain dashboard that looks like a traffic light on a bad day-mostly red. 🚦 He posted on X (formerly Twitter, because why not rename everything?): “Most Bitcoin on-chain indicators are bearish. Without macro liquidity, we enter a bear cycle.” Basically, it’s like trying to start a campfire with wet wood. 🔥💧
Acting CFTC Chair Caroline Pham, a woman of unshakable resolve, declared Thursday that exchanges registered with the agency may now list spot cryptocurrency products, including major digital assets such as Bitcoin and Ethereum. “Spot cryptocurrency will now trade on exchanges that have operated under federal standards for nearly a century,” she said, as if the 1920s had just been resurrected. 🧠
These factors may limit XRP’s ability to recover this month. The following analysis breaks them down. Or, as I like to call it, “The Great XRP Squeeze of 2023.” 🚀
Ether teeters on the edge of a knife, its price a fragile illusion. The second-largest crypto, a ghost in the machine, eyes 3,300-3,400-a zone where hope and despair collide. Breakouts? A gamble with fire. 💥
Over the course of two days, walletsustling between 100,000 and 1 million LINK-those are the true VIPs in the crypto mansion-amassed about 4.73 million tokens. Their total holdings grew from a modest 155 million to a more lavish 159.47 million. This cunning acquisition came after weeks of wallet stagnation, as if the whales suddenly remembered they liked to buy when everyone else was asleep.
“Bitcoin will fail. Because it’s a bloody lie,” scribbles Mike Brock, the erstwhile executive at Jack Dorsey’s bitcoin empire, Block. His words have caused quite the tizzy on social media, just as the cryptocurrency was starting to look perky again. 🌱💸
What drives this mad pursuit? The bloc’s regulators, frustrated by the patchwork of supervision, yearn for unity. France, Italy, and Austria, with their lofty ideals, decry the inconsistencies that undermine MiCA and breed loopholes. Their fervor was stoked when ESMA, with a wag of its finger, chastised Malta for its crypto missteps, warning of the perils to market integrity. 🇲🇹🚫
