The trading floors, once alive with the frenzied hum of activity, now echo with the silence of hesitation. The dips, those tantalizing sirens of opportunity, are left unheeded, as if the players have suddenly discovered a newfound wisdom-or perhaps merely a paralyzing fear. The market, that fickle prima donna, has taken a bow, and the audience, once so eager, now sits with arms crossed, skeptical.
In a chat with Solid Intel, shared on X-because, of course, Twitter’s now X, let’s just pretend that makes sense-Collison let slip that AI agents from OpenAI, Anthropic, and Perplexity (remember those names, they might be in your dystopian future) are already using Stripe’s tools for commerce. So, while we’re out here manually approving payments, the robots are already busy making purchases.
“One of the crucial groups in this drama is the long-term holders (LTH), a breed of investors famously indifferent to the whims of short-term price swings,” remarked the ever-mysterious CryptoQuant analyst known only as ‘Darkfost’ on Tuesday, perhaps after a particularly strong cup of coffee.
The investors, led by one Rana Handa, had poured ₹14.22 lakh into the crypto exchange Bitbns, only to find their funds locked tighter than a miser’s purse. Allegations of mismanagement and valuation inconsistencies flew like crows over a battlefield. Yet, the court, unmoved by their plight, ruled that crypto exchanges are mere private entities, not the “State” they so desperately wished to sue. Article 226, it seems, is not a magic wand for every grievance.
Blockchain and trading technology solutions providers Metalpha Technology Holding Limited, Exos Financial LLC, and BlockchainK2 Corp. have formed a partnership so grand, it could make a medieval guild blush. Their mission? To provide “regulated, professional-grade crypto solutions” for American institutions-because nothing says “professional” like a contract written in legalese and signed with a quill made of blockchain.
As reported by U.Today, one Justin Bons, founder of Cyber Capital, decided to grace the crypto world with a furious thread on X (formerly Twitter), calling on the crypto community to, and I quote, “reject all centralized ‘blockchains’.” In an absolutely delightful moment of irony, Bons specifically named Ripple, Stellar, Hedera, and Algorand as culprits.
Well, well, well. Bitcoin just decided to break out its drama queen tiara and give us a technical reading that’s more extreme than Liz Lemon’s coffee intake. According to Ash Crypto, the weekly RSI has plunged into the mid-20s, which is basically Bitcoin saying, “Hold my latte, I’m going lower than Mt. Gox, 2018, COVID, and FTX combined.” Yes, it’s that bad. Or good? Depends on whether you’re a glass-half-full or glass-thrown-at-the-wall kind of person.
On the 24th of February, the price dipped below the sacred $63,000 mark, and those same ETFs, which were supposed to be the knights in shinin’ armor, turned into the biggest varmints sellin’ off their shares. It’s like invitin’ a posse to guard your gold and then findin’ out half of ‘em were always workin’ for the bank robbers.
The job posting, unearthed by intrepid crypto scribe Frank Chaparro on February 24th, suggests the company has graduated from scribbling in the margins of blockchain experiments to carving its name into the Titanic’s hull with a pocketknife.
On February 24, Hegseth and his crew-Deputy Secretary Steve Feinberg and General Counsel Earl Matthews-sat down to hash out some of the “minor” disagreements about Claude, the fancy large language model that’s basically the Pentagon’s best-kept AI secret. It’s got a pilot contract with a $200 million price tag, and it’s the only AI that’s officially allowed to mingle with sensitive Pentagon systems. But that’s where the drama begins.