Bull Market Mania: Dan Ives Says Tech Stocks Are Just Getting Started—Seriously?!

This, at any rate, was the spirit of his address to CNBC, where, brimming with what could only be described as a Messianic fervour seasoned with just the right hint of self-interest, he announced that not only has the great journey of the tech sector only just begun, it is—one fears—a never-ending picnic. Artificial intelligence, formerly hyped only by the more excitable of TED talkers, is presently marching through the markets with all the undergraduate subtlety of a brass band.

Crypto Drama Unveiled: CZ Exposes Absurdity of Fake TON Golden Visa News 🤔🚀

Our hero, CZ, tossed a hyperlink (as one might toss stale breadcrumbs to ducks) to a Khaleej Times article. This withering missive decimates the moonshot claim that the UAE regulator lovingly entwined its fate with the TON blockchain, promising rolling deserts of crypto bliss and regulatory romance. No such affair. No wedding invitations. No blockchain dashing off with a Golden Visa stuck in its digital passport.

Crypto Crooks Caught and Caged 🚔

It appears that between February 2017 and June 2019, our dynamic duo spent their days cold-calling victims, peddling fake investments in cryptocurrency with all the finesse of a pair of snake oil salesmen. And, alas, their marks were not exactly the most discerning of individuals, parting with a staggering £1,541,799 (about $2,096,795) in the process. 💸

Crypto Invades the Continent!

Of course, there’s a catch (there’s always a catch). This service is only available to clients with Swiss accounts, because Switzerland is basically the crypto equivalent of a tropical island with no extradition treaties 🏖️. But hey, who needs regulatory headaches when you can just outsource them to the Swiss? 🙃

Bitcoin Bonanza: 116 BTC Added to the Stash 🤑

It all started on July 7, when the company, Europe’s first Bitcoin Treasury Company listed on Euronext Growth Paris, announced the completion of not one, not two, but three strategic capital raises totaling a tidy €11 million. This influx of cash enabled them to go on a Bitcoin shopping spree, and boy, did they ever. 🛍️

Crypto’s Dirty Little Secret 🤫

The average person doesn’t need a faster settlement layer; they need a better entry point, one that doesn’t leave them bewildered and frustrated. And that’s where fiat-to-crypto on-ramps come in – those unsung heroes of the crypto world. Payment gateways, crypto debit cards, native wallet integrations – these are the true drivers of mainstream adoption, not the flashy, headline-grabbing innovations that dominate the industry’s discourse. 💸