Bitcoin’s Mempool: A Ghost Town at Record Highs 🤔

On Saturday, the mempool had just 5,000 odd transactions awaiting inclusion, with the tally rising to 15,000 at press time. Still, this is a far cry from the 150,000 transactions when BTC’s price first soared above $100,000 in late 2024, according to data from Blockchain.com. 📈

3 Wild Altcoins to Ride the AI Chatbot Gold Rush—Even Google’s Sweatin’ 🚀

Now, don’t mistake these tokens for mere meme coins with the IQ of a goldfish and nothing but rocket emojis for credentials. These here are hard-nosed upstarts, using blockchain wizardry to keep content safe, fill creators’ pockets, and outsmart the AI critters that threaten to gobble up the web. So, let’s drag this tale through the mud and see which tokens are worth the ride in this wild, AI-driven bonanza.

Bitcoin to $230K? 🤑

It appears that both Bitcoin and Solana are on the cusp of completing a most propitious chart pattern, the vaunted “cup and handle” 🏆. Should this come to pass, we may witness a veritable explosion of growth, with BTC price and SOL price targets reaching for the stars at $230,000 and $4,390, respectively 🌟.

Is the Internet Computer Really Changing? Meanwhile, Lightchain AI Stuns with $21M Raise!

But let’s not get bogged down in branding. The real magic here is their “Self-Writing Internet,” which sounds like something straight out of a sci-fi novel. In this brave new world, users can create apps by describing them in natural language, without needing to code. It’s the software equivalent of asking for a sandwich without knowing how to make one. Genius, right? 🤯

Larry David DESTROYS Crypto FOMO Before FOMC Minutes—Bitcoin to the Moon or Bust?

Meanwhile, Bitcoin (BTC) just keeps hanging around $108,000. Doesn’t go up, doesn’t go down—just sits there. Reminds me of my neighbor’s car that never moves but somehow always gets a parking ticket. Ethereum (ETH)? Same story above $2,500. Completely sideways. If boredom were a sport, ETH would win gold. The total crypto market cap is $3.32 trillion, and you’d think that kind of money would get you a little excitement. Nope. Nothing. Nada.💤

Christine Lagarde Declares War on Stablecoins: Is Your Money About to Get “Privatized”?

Across the marble halls of power, a new anxiety flutters among the central bankers—these digital so-called “stablecoins,” birthed not by the Motherland, but by companies with names like ‘Circle’ and ‘Tether’ (hardly inspiring trust, like being protected by a bouncer called ‘Cotton Candy’). Madame Lagarde, steely-eyed and unamused, has cast her gaze upon these coins and found them wanting—and perhaps, a little insulting.