It was a Christmas Eve like no other, a tale of digital despair and $6 million vanishing into the ether faster than grandma’s fruitcake. Trust Wallet, the crypto guardian angel, had its halo tarnished by a nasty little bug hiding in its browser extension version 2.68. 🐛🎄
Remember when prediction markets were just for betting on elections and sports? Cute. By 2025, they’d evolved into a multibillion-dollar ecosystem, cozying up to Wall Street, media giants, and even crypto infrastructure. 🌐💸
Meanwhile, in Retail Land, DeepSnitch AI is handing out 100% bonuses like Oprah giving away cars. “YOU get a bonus! YOU get a bonus! And YOU, whale in the back, DEFINITELY get a bonus!” 🚀 This presale is hotter than a Kardashian gossip column, raking in $890K and making everyone wonder if they should quit their day jobs.
On December 25th, 2025 – a date when sensible people were presumably opening presents or arguing with relatives – Obyte celebrated its ninth anniversary since its birth as “Byteball” in 2016. How quaint.
So, BC Card announced on Tuesday-yeah, I know, thrilling stuff-that they wrapped up this two-month pilot where people could use their foreign stablecoins to pay for stuff in Korea. Like, who has time for this? But apparently, it’s a big deal because now you can scan a QR code and buy a $20 cup of coffee without exchanging your dollars. 🌏☕
Our good friend Darkfost from CryptoQuant, ever the diligent observer, noted on the 24th day of this frosty month that “the latest data shows a clear decline in Bitcoin inflows to Binance coming from whales over the course of December.” From a staggering $7.88 billion, the inflows have plummeted to a mere $3.86 billion, halved as if by some cruel twist of fate! It is a phenomenon worthy of both awe and laughter-how quickly fortunes can wane! 😂
In a move that can only be described as “slightly aggressive,” BitMine has made yet another enormous leap into the Ethereum realm. They’ve recently acquired 67,886 ETH, which is roughly equivalent to one very expensive dinner for a large family of crypto enthusiasts. 🍽️
Apparently, young Armstrong was quite the whizz with computers as a nipper. “My mater was a programmer at IBM, and pater, a civil engineer,” he chirped. “Got our first IBM 486 PC, and by Jove, I was hooked!” 🖥️ Quite the quaint tale, what?
Arkham’s Emmett Gallic, a man who probably knows more about crypto than your Google search history, reported that Bilyuchenko’s “unknown exchanges” now have $114M stashed there. Spoiler: The exchanges are mysterious, the future is bleak, and we’re all just happening to live through this. 🎩
Good Heavens! Hashkey Capital Done Raised a Quarter Billion!