Cryptonews

TON Foundation, that generous non-profit (sarcasm levels: high 😉), has finally caved and let OpenPayd handle its fiat chaos. Because nothing says “trust” like outsourcing your money stuff to a company with a name that sounds like a typo. 🤷♂️

As global crypto volatility peaked and major coin prices tumbled, the sector’s two giants, Bitcoin and Ethereum, became primary casualties, like two weary knights in a duel with no end in sight. 🏰⚔️

At the time of this writing, our furry friend, DOGE, was trading at about $0.129-down a smidgen, which, to be fair, is more than I can say for my Aunt Gertrude’s soufflés. Now, let us unravel this mystery: a weekly RSI that low usually suggests that the sellers have been playing the lead role in this little drama for quite some time. And in the grand theatre of trading, such prolonged pressure carries far more weight than yesterday’s gossip.

For months, this canine coin has trudged downward, trading below moving averages with the steadfastness of a bureaucrat in a Gogol tale. Few rallies, much decline-a true martyr of the charts. Yet, mark this well: the sell-off’s nature has shifted, and this shift is more profound than the price itself. The panic phase, like a misfired joke, nears its end. 🤡📉

They’re betting on “safe haven demand” (aka the debasement trade, which is just a fancy way of saying “our money is getting less valuable, so let’s all buy Bitcoin!”) and “regulatory clarity” (which, honestly, is about as clear as a foggy day in January). 🤷‍♀️

In true sarcastic fashion, our meme-loving hero tweeted, “Tis the season to be jolly,” as if a massive dip in Bitcoin’s price was just the latest plot twist in a Christmas rom-com. 🎄📉 The tweet came alongside a chart that could only be described as Santa sliding down a hill-if that hill were made of Bitcoin’s plummeting value! Who knew crypto could be so… entertaining?

Look at that chart! The top 100 wallets-those fat cats with their paws in the honeypot-have hoarded 20.46 million LINK, worth a whopping $263 million. 🤑 And just when you thought they’d had their fill, they started gobbling again in November. Why? Because they’re smarter than a fox in a henhouse, that’s why! Meanwhile, ETF inflows are as steady as a tortoise in a race, 🐢 giving LINK a little nudge towards the sunshine.

The figures, courtesy of the astute observer Ali Martinez and his trusty Santiment, reveal a startling truth: wallets cradling between 1 million and 100 million XRP have divested themselves of a staggering 1.18 billion XRP since late November. Their holdings dwindled from a robust 4.8 billion XRP to a mere 3.62 billion by the mid-December chill. Quite the magic trick, wouldn’t you say? 🪄

On a Tuesday, no less, the crypto infrastructure firm StraitX proclaimed its grand design: to launch its Singapore dollar stablecoin XSGD and U.S. dollar stablecoin XUSD upon the Solana public blockchain. A scheme to simplify currency exchange, they declare with a flourish! 🌟