Crypto Chaos: Gogol Laughs as Coins Plunge!

CoinDesk Indices

Oh, dear reader, behold the monstrous farce that is CoinDesk Indices, where they parade the daily follies like a bureaucratic inspector reviewing the noses of the market! Ah, what a spectacle: leaders and laggards in this CoinDesk 20 farce, each asset performing its absurd dance. 🤡

The CoinDesk 20, that whimsical creature, crawls at 3608.8, slinking downward 2.0% (-72.51) from 4 p.m. ET on that dreary Monday. Oh, the indignity! 😂

Not a single one of these 20 vagabonds dares trade upward-perish the thought! They all bow to the gravity of their own folly.

Leaders, you say? Ha! SOL stumbles at -0.9% and UNI at -1.4%-what weak titans! And the laggards? LINK plummets -3.5% and XRP a miserable -3.2%, like drunken officials in a blizzard. 🙄

Ah, but remember, comrades, this CoinDesk 20 is a broad scam, traded on platforms across regions, as if bureaucracy could ever save these sinking ships. 🍻

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2025-10-21 17:14