Crypto Crisis: How Much Red Can Your Portfolio Handle Before Melting? 😱

by

Markets

What to know:

  • Well, well, well! The crypto market is experiencing a spectacular nosedive, with the CoinDesk 20 Index plunging 5% in just 24 hours. Talk about a dramatic twist! 😲
  • Futures markets are like a massive game of musical chairs, with capital outflows causing chaos and everyone scrambling to buy put options. Because who doesn’t want a safety net on a rollercoaster ride? 🎢
  • Keep your eyes peeled for the U.S. core PCE data due later; if inflation surprises us by being as hot as a stolen jalapeño, we could see some serious volatility! 🔥

Oh dear, the crypto market looks like it just attended a disastrous dinner party. The CoinDesk 20 Index is down a whopping 5% and all major tokens are sulking in their corners. 🙄

With major tokens seeing capital flee the futures market like it’s on fire, the demand for put options has soared. (So much drama – it’s practically a soap opera!)

And did someone say “Friday the 13th”? Because the U.S. core PCE is arriving soon, and if it’s hotter than expected, markets are going to be wailing like it’s the end of the world! 😱

Token Talk

By Francisco Rodrigues

  • Introducing Plasma, the newbie blockchain designed for stablecoins! It launched its mainnet beta and the native token XPL, perfectly timed with a valuation over $12 billion. Because why not? 💸
  • Backed by the big guns like Bitfinex and Peter Thiel (yes, that Peter), Plasma kicked off with over $2 billion worth of XPL tokens. It’s like a trust fund baby, but for crypto!
  • Promising to be the Usain Bolt of stablecoin operations, Plasma aims to be the go-to backend for the latest in DeFi applications. At launch, liquidity was already splashing around in top platforms like Aave and Ethereum. 💦
  • Among these is Plasma One, advertised as the “stablecoin-native neobank.” Sounds fancy, but will it come with complimentary lattes? ☕
  • Warning! Some tokens sold to U.S. investors are locked tighter than a bear market until mid-2026. What a tease! 😜

Derivatives Positioning

By Omkar Godbole

  • Most major tokens, including BTC and ETH, are still shedding capital like a snake in spring. The notional open interest (OI) is taking a plunge – and honestly, it’s the only thing diving around here! 
  • Market turbulence is shaking out overleveraged bets faster than you can say “bubble-burst” – and we’re here for the drama. 🙏
  • BTC and ETH OI has been in decline over the last few hours, making us wonder if that little “price recovery” is just a mirage. 🚀
  • And smaller coins like KAS and KCS are having a bit of a party with moderate increases in OI! Lucky them! 🎉
  • Over on Aster DEX, trading volumes in crypto perpetuals soared to over $46 billion in the last 24 hours. Hyperliquid? Please, it’s just a drop in the bucket at $17 billion! 💧
  • On the CME, BTC futures OI has almost done a complete 180 on the early September spike – just like your friend who promises they’re on a diet but orders dessert anyway. 😅
  • In case you were wondering, ETH futures and options are still sitting pretty on Deribit, patiently waiting for a price lift-off, while BTC, ETH options risk reversals are decidedly leaning bearish. Talk about pessimism! 🙈
  • Meanwhile, SOL and XRP are feeling froggy and pricing is bullish for year-end expiry. Lucky ducks! 🦆

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2025-09-26 16:16