- Lo and behold! The U.S. Treasury has graciously removed Tornado Cash from its sanctions list, leading to a miraculous 100% gain for TORN! 🎉
- Insiders, with their noses in the air, declared this a ‘triumph’ for the noble cause of privacy tech in the crypto realm. 🕵️♂️
On the fateful day of March 21, the U.S. Treasury, in a move that could only be described as a plot twist worthy of a novel, decided to delist Tornado Cash—a cryptocurrency mixer that plays hide-and-seek with transaction trails and recipients—from its sanctions list. Naturally, the market insiders, those ever-optimistic seers, hailed this as yet another regulatory victory for the champions of privacy-focused technology. 🥳
In a moment of profound reflection, Coinbase founder Brian Armstrong, with the wisdom of a sage, proclaimed,
“No one wants to see bad folks use crypto. But privacy is an important feature for many law-abiding citizens, and you can’t sanction open source code (it’s a free speech issue). Glad to see this get fixed.”
The Curious Case of Tornado Cash and North Korea 🌪️
In the summer of 2022, the Biden Administration, in a fit of righteous indignation, sanctioned Tornado Cash under the watchful eye of the Treasury Department’s Office of Foreign Assets Control (OFAC). This was after whispers in the wind suggested that North Korean actors were using the platform to launder billions of dollars, stolen from the unsuspecting crypto space. The founders and developers of Tornado Cash, including the illustrious Alexey Pertsev and the enigmatic Roman Storm, found themselves in quite the pickle, facing indictments. 🍯
Despite some industry figures calling for the heads of the bad actors rather than the creators of the platform, the wheels of justice turned slowly, if at all. 🐢
However, a U.S. court, in a moment of clarity last November, ruled that the OFAC had overstepped its bounds by sanctioning Tornado Cash. Yet, like a stubborn stain, the platform remained blacklisted until just yesterday. 🕰️
In a statement that echoed through the halls of power, U.S. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent reiterated the same old tune, saying,
“Securing the digital asset industry from abuse by North Korea and other illicit actors is essential to establishing U.S. leadership and ensuring that the American people can benefit from financial innovation and inclusion.”
Armstrong, ever the optimist, expressed his readiness to collaborate with the government to combat the “0.1% of illicit activity in crypto,” as per the sacred American laws. ⚖️
Thanks to this latest twist in the tale, Balaji Srinivasan, the former Coinbase CTO, called for immediate pardons and restitution for the beleaguered founders of Tornado Cash. He declared,
“Privacy wins. Tornado Cash is legal. Now, Roman Storm and Alexey Pertsev should be immediately freed, pardoned, and reimbursed by the state for their invalid prosecution.”
For his part, Roman Storm, with a twinkle in his eye, hailed the delisting as a ‘victory’ for privacy technology and TORN, the native token of TC. In a dramatic turn of events, TORN skyrocketed by over 100% after the news, leaping from $8 to nearly $16. Alas, as the ink dried on this tale, most of those gains had vanished like a puff of smoke. 💨
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2025-03-22 12:14