Crypto Stocks That Might Make You Rich or Not: The Wild Week Ahead

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The final week of August rolled in with all the enthusiasm of a Monday morning alarm – slow, dismal, and daydreaming about a vacation nobody booked. Crypto markets sighed like a cat caught in a rainstorm, with trading activity doing its best impression of a turtle on sedatives and global market cap slipping by 6%. A real nail-biter, folks.

But, just when you thought it was safe to check your portfolio, a few brave US crypto stocks decided to shake things up and prove that maybe – just maybe – there’s still some life left in the somewhat-dead crypto carnival ride. So buckle up, folks. This week’s looking like a rollercoaster with a questionable safety record.

Bitdeer Technologies Group (BTDR)

On Monday, Bitdeer’s shares closed at $14.29, up a modest 4.46%. Positively tiny for those expecting a moon landing, but hey, it’s a start. The company dropped its unaudited second-quarter results, and really, who doesn’t love a good financial soap opera?

Q2 2025 brought in an eye-popping $155.6 million, up from $99.2 million a year prior – apparently, a lot of people are mining, or at least pretending to. But here’s the catch: operating costs nearly doubled to $142.8 million. So, gross profit? A grand total of $12.8 million. Slightly better than a kick in the pants, but the icing on the cake was a net loss of $147.7 million – up from $17.7 million, proving that sometimes numbers lie, but losses rarely do.

Expect volatility, dear reader. Pre-market, the stock is trading at $13.98. If demand surges, it might hop to $14.77 – or, heaven forbid, plummet to $13.57 if everyone realizes they’d rather do literally anything else.

Pro tip: Always bet on volatility. It’s the only thing guaranteed in crypto.

IREN Limited (IREN)

IREN finished Monday at a cool $26.45, a 14.80% jump – because who doesn’t love a good partnership with NVIDIA? Nothing says “trust me” like dropping a quarter of your value in a day, right? Investors apparently have an eye for shiny new toys.

On August 28, IREN bragged about snagging NVIDIA Preferred Partner status and dropping about $168 million on an additional 2,400 GPUs – because apparently, more is more when it comes to machines that look like they came from a sci-fi movie. All in all, they now own a fleet of 10,900 GPUs. If that wasn’t enough of a flex, IREN in pre-market is trading at $26.13, showing some hesitation. If sellers get aggressive, it might dip below $25.62 – or, in the best case, bounce back to $29.50 if enthusiasm reigns supreme.

Hold onto your hats; the GPU army might be the only thing keeping IREN afloat – or sinking it faster than you can say “Silicon Valley.”

Hut 8 Corp (HUT)

HUT closed at $26.73, a tiny 0.83% rise – like frosting on a stale cake. But don’t let the meek gains fool you; behind the scenes, they’re planning world domination, or at least expanding their crypto fortress. They’re developing four new sites across the U.S., because apparently, the best way to scare competitors is with more data centers. Overall, they’re aiming for over 2.5 gigawatts of capacity across 19 sites – which sounds like just enough power to run a small city or a very dedicated Bitcoin miner.

In pre-market, HUT hovers around $26, but beware – if demand fades, it might drop below $24.74. Or, if we’re lucky, it could climb to $27.40 and pretend everything’s fine.

Stay tuned: If the demand holds, this stock might be your new favorite rollercoaster – or a very boring line at the amusement park.

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2025-09-03 01:37