“Dave Portnoy and the 6 Million Token Saga You Won’t Believe! 🤑”
Dave Portnoy, founder of Barstool Sports and professional chaos enthusiast, recently announced that he returned 6 million Libra (LIBRA) tokens to its founder, Hayden Davis. These tokens were apparently his reward for agreeing to boost the project. Oh yes, because nothing says “investment opportunity” like a crypto coin and a promotional deal sewn together with duct tape and poor decisions. 🚀💸
But wait, it gets juicier. Portnoy claims Davis later demanded he keep mum about the compensation, which, let’s be honest, is a bit like asking an influencer to promote a vegan burger without admitting it’s made entirely out of turnips.
During a Feb. 16 X spaces chat (yes, spaces are still a thing), Portnoy revealed he didn’t just receive these tokens—oh no, he bought some too. But here’s the kicker: he told Davis, in his trademark nuanced way:
“I can’t accept coins if you don’t f—king let me say you gave me coins, and I’m part of the project. So, I literally sent the coins back. This is all going on before any of this sh—t — before I knew this was a disaster.”
Bravo, Dave. The man won’t be silenced, and his dubious tokens won’t be pocketed, either. Unfortunately, the ones he *did* buy? Well, let’s just say their value went the way of MySpace. 📉
Despite the token’s nosedive, Portnoy kept chatting with Davis as the whole project combusted in slow motion. Through it all, Portnoy concluded that Davis probably wasn’t out to rug-pull anyone (intentionally). Instead, he blamed Argentine President Javier Milei, who seemed to pull a disappearing act à la “crypto Houdini” during the project launch.
President Javier Milei: From Token King to Political Hot Potato 🥔
Enter Javier Milei, the Argentine president who thought dabbling in crypto promo was a good idea. Spoiler: It wasn’t. Viva la Libertad—the token dream—was lovingly pitched as a project to fund small businesses. But in reality, it featured more crashes than a demolition derby.
The president promoted Libra in a now-deleted X post (the modern equivalent of “Who, me?”) before the price tanked over 95%, wiping out around $107 million in liquidity. Ouch. That’s gotta hurt more than stepping on a LEGO. 🤑➡️😢
After the token’s demise, Milei tried to Houdini away from association, claiming he barely knew anything about the project. Political opponents, however, were probably drafting the lines “We told you so!” in bold,underline, and Comic Sans.
Now, facing calls for impeachment, Milei’s dream job could go the same way as Libra—straight into the abyss. If the All-Opposition Orchestra succeeds in ousting him, Milei might be remembered not as a populist leader but as the world’s least effective coinfluencer. 🚫📉
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2025-02-17 01:00