Picture this: You’ve handed over every scrap of personal information for a shot at quality healthcare (and a seat in that cozy, awkward waiting room). Now, courtesy of a hacking extravaganza at an Arkansas clinic, you get the bonus of your identity potentially starring in a sequel to “Catch Me If You Can.” 🎭
The Highlands Oncology Group, a bastion of hope for those needing cancer care and, now, unintentional career launcher for cybercriminals, admitted to the Maine Attorney General that hackers helped themselves to the data of 113,575 Americans. That’s enough people to fill a small city—or almost every branch of Hardee’s in Arkansas at lunchtime.
Highlands, in a statement that was perhaps more “oops” than “oh no,” said that some mysterious entity (almost certainly not your grandma) “accessed and acquired” files. What did the hackers grab? Oh, just the usual: names, birth dates, Social Security numbers, driver’s licenses, passport digits, credit and debit card info, financial accounts, medical records, and enough other numbers to keep a mathematician up at night. Yes, even your massage therapy records may now be internationally renowned. 💅
“Highlands Oncology Group PA recently discovered a data incident that may have involved the personal information for certain individuals. On June 2, 2025, Highlands discovered it was the victim of a cyber-attack, and certain Highlands files and systems were inaccessible…
The forensic investigation determined that an unauthorized third party accessed Highlands’ computer network at times between January 21, 2025, and June 2, 2025, and encrypted some of its files. The investigation also determined that the third party may have accessed and acquired certain files from Highlands’ systems during this period.”
Highlands offers everything from chemo and radiation, to more gentle fare like massages and genetic counseling—not to mention involuntary crash courses in cybersecurity. If there was a loyalty card, you’d probably get a punch for “complimentary identity theft defense.”
become your own bank detective because apparently, that’s 21st century healthcare.
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2025-08-04 11:22