Kidnapped by Fake Cops, Scammer Loses $50M: Karma’s a Bitch 🤷‍♂️

Imagine being kidnapped by fake cops, drugged, and handcuffed to a bed for five days, only to lose $50 million in cryptocurrency. That’s the kind of bad day Rodrigo Perez had in Brazil. And honestly, it’s hard to feel sorry for him. 🍿

In a plot twist that even Netflix would reject for being too ridiculous, Rodrigo Perez, a Spanish businessman with a rap sheet longer than a CVS receipt, was kidnapped by fake policemen in São Paulo. These “officers” used an official-looking truck to whisk him away to a makeshift prison where he was drugged, tied to a bed, and harassed for five days. Sounds like a bad Airbnb experience, doesn’t it? 🛏️💊

Perez, ever the resourceful criminal, managed to escape by drugging his captor with the same sleeping pills they’d been feeding him. Talk about poetic justice. But when he reported the kidnapping to the authorities, they discovered he was wanted by Interpol for a series of crypto scams. Oops. 🚨

According to Perez, the kidnappers made off with $50 million in cryptocurrency. That’s enough to buy a small island or, in Perez’s case, a lifetime supply of handcuffs. One of the kidnappers, Ronaldo Batista, was arrested, but his accomplice is still on the loose. Maybe he’s busy counting his crypto. 💰

Authorities suspect gang involvement, which isn’t surprising given Perez’s alleged history of financial fraud. As for Perez, he’s in a weird limbo—treated as a victim but also under investigation for his own crimes. It’s like being the star of your own true crime documentary. 🎥

This whole debacle highlights the rise of “$5 wrench attacks” in the crypto world, where bad actors resort to old-school violence to steal digital assets. It’s a reminder that no matter how advanced technology gets, some people will always prefer a good old-fashioned kidnapping. 🔧

Read more: Grand Theft Crypto: Family Kidnapped for $15 Million Ransom in Chicago

2025-04-04 11:59

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