Russian Advisor Claims US Will Hide Debt in Stablecoins: Is the Dollar Getting Crypto-Richy?

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A senior Russian advisor has suggested that the US may be shifting part of its national debt into stablecoins and gold. The move, he claimed, could help reduce the debt’s real value and reset the financial system. This may sound suspiciously like magic but with more accountants and fewer rabbits. 🦄💸

Anton Kobyakov, a special advisor to Russian President Vladimir Putin-and reportedly a man who owns three calculators and trusts none of them-made the statement at the Eastern Economic Forum, thus instantly achieving Level 9 on the “International Stirring of Pots” leaderboard.

Russia’s US Advisor Points to Debt Strategy

Kobyakov argued that the United States (that land of baseball, burgers, and debt the size of a small galaxy) is exploring new ways to manage its $35 trillion obligation. He said, “The US is changing rules in both the gold and cryptocurrency markets to counter falling confidence in the dollar.” Translation: the economic equivalent of rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic-except the Titanic now floats on a sea of blockchain and memes. 🚢🔗

Russia just accused the US of using crypto to wipe out its $35T debt.

Putin’s adviser Kobyakov says Washington will shove debt into stablecoins, devalue it, and reset the system.

– TFTC (@TFTC21) September 8, 2025

According to Kobyakov, the government could place part of its debt in stablecoins, which he charmingly described as a “crypto cloud.” (And for those wondering, it’s the only cloud Wall Street doesn’t want to burst.) His theory: toss your debt into cyberspace and-presto!-the whole thing loses value faster than a 1997 Tamagotchi. 🥚💨

He compared this approach to previous US strategies in the 1930s and 1970s, when global financial adjustments cleverly offloaded the costs onto other nations. Picture a giant game of hot potato, only instead of potatoes, it’s economic torment. 🥔⬆️

President Donald Trump-yes, still him-signed something called the GENIUS Act, a framework for issuing and trading stablecoins backed by fiat or US Treasuries. Supporters say it brings regulatory clarity and preserves dollar dominance, although it’s likely just another chapter in humanity’s ages-old quest to write confusing laws about imaginary money. 📜🦾

Russia, meanwhile, has chosen to make things much more Cyrillic. The Kremlin plans to launch a ruble-backed stablecoin, A7A5, on the Tron blockchain-proof that even Russian statecraft occasionally wanders into science fiction territory. Moscow views the project as a bid to reduce dependence on dollar-flavored digital assets like Tether (USDT), presumably so future generations won’t be forced to pay for borscht with Dogecoin. 🥄💸

Kobyakov insists this parallel evolution marks a new phase in global finance. While the US tries tossing its debt into the crypto void, Russia dreams of payment networks free from American influence. In both cases, the message is clear: crypto is now part of every economist’s toolkit-or in the words of Douglas Adams, humanity’s latest instrument for confusing itself. 🤷‍♂️🌏💻

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2025-09-09 12:23