In the shadow of geopolitical storms, where alliances crumble like brittle parchment, the titan of industry found time to etch another chapter into the annals of financial absurdity. On a day when the nation pauses to honor a dreamer’s legacy, the world’s most audacious corporate custodian of the digital relic announced the acquisition of an additional 22,305 bitcoins, a sum that now seems almost quaint in the current market.
At an average price of $95,284 per coin, the firm’s vaults now hold 709,715 BTC, a treasure amassed over half a decade at an average of $76,000. The total cost? A mere $54 billion, a figure that pales in comparison to the $64.6 billion valuation today. Yet, amid this numerical triumph, the specter of global discord looms-Trump’s whimsy over Greenland’s icy expanse and the EU’s feigned outrage have turned crypto markets into a rollercoaster of despair.
Strategy has acquired 22,305 BTC for ~$2.13 billion at ~$95,284 per bitcoin. As of 1/19/2026, we hodl 709,715 $BTC acquired for ~$53.92 billion at ~$75,979 per bitcoin. $MSTR $STRC
– Michael Saylor (@saylor) January 20, 2026
The timing, as ever, is a masterclass in irony. While the world teeters on the edge of chaos, Saylor’s empire thrives, its gains a testament to both human folly and the peculiar logic of markets. One wonders: is this a stroke of genius, or merely the delirium of a man who mistook a spreadsheet for a prophecy?
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2026-01-20 16:28