When Gerry Turner and Theresa Nist decided to divorce after just three months of marriage in April 2024, the first-ever lead of The Golden Bachelor didn’t expect it would be such a public and upsetting split – one of the most dramatic in the show’s history.
And that’s no small feat when you consider the other contenders on that list.
After his wife, Toni, passed away shortly after retiring in 2017 – they had been married for 43 years – the man quickly fell in love with Theresa, who was on the first season of the show’s spin-off.
Both having experienced long marriages and prioritizing family, the two people in their seventies appeared to be finding love again. She had been married to Billy for 42 years before he passed away in 2014.
Their relationship ended before they could even settle down and use the new china they’d bought.
Looking back, it’s clear now what I should have noticed,” the 74-year-old Indiana native told TopMob News’ Francesca Amiker in an exclusive interview. “I wish I’d recognized the warning signs earlier.”
Instead, he saw a playful go-getter, eager to tackle life’s adventures by his side.
I’ve been following Gerry and Theresa’s story for a while now, and honestly, he always seemed a little unsure if she was truly being honest with him on the show. He admitted it was possible she was just telling him what he wanted to hear. But what really ended things for them, in his mind, was when Theresa suddenly changed her plans and decided not to retire. That’s when he knew, for sure, that things were over between them.
Gerry explained that his partner initially said she’d be willing to stop working once she found the right person. However, she later changed her mind, and they tried to find a solution that worked for both of them. Ultimately, Gerry realized he needed a partner who shared his desire for adventure, fun, and travel, which wasn’t possible if she continued to work.
He never intended to share the thornier details of their separation.
I initially planned to remain silent after the show, and I kept that promise for many months,” he explained to TopMob. “But a lot of stories spread, including inaccuracies and frankly, some hints and suggestions – and some of that information came from Theresa.
In a November 2024 interview on the Almost Famous podcast, Theresa suggested that the distance between her and her husband wasn’t the only issue in their marriage. She explained, “You can’t really get to know someone in just four weeks,” and added that she didn’t want to elaborate further.
Gerry, however, did write a book. He used his diary entries from when he was filming the show to create his new memoir, Golden Years: What I’ve Learned from Love, Loss, and Reality TV.
Theresa is awaiting further details, but responded after a short clip revealed her ex-husband, Gerry, felt confined before their wedding in January 2024.
She told Us Weekly on October 13th that it was heartbreaking to learn he felt so hopeless and stuck. She expressed her wish that he had reached out for help instead of suffering in silence.
She wished he’d confided in her sooner, but she finally understood why he’d been so unkind in the past. As she put it, “People shouldn’t criticize others for the same faults they have themselves.”
If she decides to join in and throw a few pebbles, Gerry emphasized it’s not a contest. He clarified that wasn’t the goal at all.
Rather, he explained, “I have a story to tell here that is truthful, and I want to tell that.”
Will you accept his version of events?
The loss of Gerry Turner’s high school sweetheart, Toni—and mother to his daughters Jenny Young and Angie Warner—to a bacterial infection just weeks after they settled into their new lakefront home in 2017 was incredibly painful. What made it even more devastating was discovering, shortly after her death, that she had been diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes.
He explained in his 2025 memoir, Golden Years: What I’ve Learned From Love, Loss, and Reality TV, that he was overwhelmed with regret and questions. He realized that uncontrolled diabetes puts a lot of strain on the body, especially the kidneys. He wondered if Toni could have lived longer if she’d gotten treatment, but perhaps she didn’t want to burden anyone with her problems. He also questioned if he had, in some way, discouraged her from sharing her health concerns with him, and why she hadn’t felt comfortable talking to him about her diabetes.
Even though he couldn’t bring himself to stay in the Indiana house they’d shared, he put up a picture of his wife of 43 years in his new home’s closet. He explained he wanted to see her smiling face every morning while getting dressed.
He disagreed with a 2023 article in The Hollywood Reporter that detailed his life after retirement, including relationships he hadn’t mentioned on The Golden Bachelor. He claimed he hadn’t dated in over forty years, but admitted in his book, “They did get one thing right: I met her at Toni’s funeral.”
He started dating, and eventually moved in with, a woman he felt a strong connection with. However, he admits he rushed into things. He hadn’t been in a relationship since he was 18, and even if he’d been emotionally ready, that should have signaled him to slow down. Instead, he did the opposite.
Joan Vassos, who was set to be the Golden Bachelorette, decided to leave the show because her daughter was having a difficult time after giving birth. Though Gerry understood her reasons, he was deeply disappointed. He confessed, “I was really hoping she could be the one for me, so it was very upsetting.”
Several months after their breakup, she sent him a copy of a beautiful coffee table book by photographer Annie Leibovitz – a book he’d mentioned he liked when they were together.
He admitted he still hoped to be a part of her life. Visiting her while she was giving out roses, he realized, “I was glad Joan seemed happy with how things were going,” but also felt a pang of sadness, because a part of him would always care for her.
Oh my gosh, watching Gerry try to figure out who to send home was brutal! It was so clear he really struggled with Ellen’s goodbye, poor thing. Before hometowns, he said keeping Faith and Leslie was easy, a total given. But the real drama? That was between Ellen, the sweet retired teacher, and Theresa, who, spoiler alert, he ended up with. It was honestly heartbreaking to watch him decide between those two, it felt like a soul-crushing decision for him!
He described both candidates as likeable and optimistic, and saw no immediate concerns with either of them. He felt either one could make a great partner. Despite being tired and pressed for time, he knew Ellen needed to be let go.
He said he ended things with her because he didn’t feel a romantic connection. While he wasn’t completely certain Theresa was the right person for him, he was even more sure that Ellen wasn’t a good match.
Gerry said he was thrilled to be with Leslie, who would later finish second. However, he sometimes concerned himself with her fast-paced lifestyle, noting her past relationship with a famous person.
He couldn’t decide between Leslie and Theresa, and started to worry that the fitness instructor’s two divorces suggested they had very different ideas about what commitment meant, which could cause problems for them later on.
Looking back, he realized the issue wasn’t Leslie’s lack of commitment, but rather Gerry’s own insecurity, especially when compared to how devoted Theresa had been to her late husband. He’d initially seen it as a warning sign, but now understood it differently.
He didn’t intend to hurt her feelings, and he regrets telling both Leslie and Faith he loved them while they were back home.
He explained that he meant what he said to Leslie and Faith at the time. However, looking back, he realizes that true love requires complete and total devotion to one person. He felt he hadn’t given that to either of them, and that regret still weighs on him.
After host Jesse Palmer invited them to spend a private night in the fantasy suites, Gerry became certain about his feelings for Theresa. They talked about their future together, including her plans to leave her job in finance, and Gerry realized he’d found the woman he wanted to marry. He said he knew, based on everything he’d learned about her, that he couldn’t imagine his life without her.
But his decision to offer the final rose to the New Jersey resident was certainly a thorny one.
In his memoir, he explained that while Theresa initially seemed like the most sensible choice, Leslie quickly became a strong possibility when he listened to his heart. He found himself torn between the two women, constantly weighing the comfort of the familiar with the thrill of something new and potentially uncertain. It was a choice between safety and excitement.
Gerry and Theresa celebrated their engagement in Costa Rica with a special meal delivered to their room. The feast made Gerry realize Theresa had all the qualities he desired in a partner – she was cheerful, thoughtful, and kind.
I’ve always been fascinated by their connection, and it’s so relatable. He described how tough it became when they weren’t physically together. He admitted those nightly calls weren’t always easy – he noticed she had the same way of speaking no matter what she was talking about, whether it was something serious at work or just something small like getting breakfast. It was like she couldn’t quite shift gears, and he found that surprisingly hard to navigate.
Their secret weekend in New York City didn’t exactly spark romance. Gerry quickly discovered Theresa was very strict about her diet, avoiding sugar completely – a lifestyle choice he wasn’t thrilled about, especially since she was in charge of the groceries.
He explained that his meals consisted of just fish and salad. When he asked her what groceries she’d recommend for energy, she told him, ‘I don’t eat anything like that.’
Gerry readily admits he wasn’t familiar with the Kardashians. After the show, he was invited to Kris Jenner’s home for dinner, and he wasn’t worried at all. In fact, he confessed he didn’t know much about the family. While on the way, he jokingly suggested to a member of the production team that the Kardashians might be benefiting from their show’s success. The production team member was clearly shocked by the comment.
Throughout the night, he spoke with Kendall Jenner’s boyfriend, Bad Bunny, and even had a conversation with Kris Jenner about hearing aids. However, he denied Kendall’s accusation that he was flirting with her mother. He explained, “That’s not true. I was just quickly caught up in her lively personality.”
While every relationship has its challenges, Gerry’s with Theresa was particularly difficult. A major issue was Theresa telling him during a private date that she was ready to retire, then later saying she needed another year to save for retirement. Gerry felt misled, writing, “I was upset because her financial situation wasn’t what she’d said on the show,” and he started to question what else she hadn’t been truthful about.
He became increasingly annoyed by her daily $12 smoothies and her lack of cooking, estimating she ate out or ordered takeout four to five nights a week.
He didn’t feel settled in New Jersey, and she disliked the rural life in Indiana – she told Gerry she couldn’t imagine living there because it felt too isolated. They had planned to move to South Carolina together, but he said she turned down every house he found in the $800,000 to $1.25 million price range, and instead wanted properties costing over $4 million.
Even though Gerry started having doubts about Theresa as their wedding neared (“As it got closer and closer to our wedding date, my doubts about Theresa grew”), they went ahead with the ceremony and exchanged vows on television in January 2024.
Gerry, having seen how complicated divorces can be, knew a prenuptial agreement was essential. He sent the documents to Theresa right away, but grew anxious as she didn’t sign them immediately. He worried she was deliberately delaying to let the deadline pass. Although she eventually signed, the experience made Gerry seriously doubt their relationship and wonder if they’d rushed into things – he confessed to having major second thoughts about getting married so soon.
He knew there was nothing he could do to prevent the wedding, especially without embarrassing himself or Theresa. His only option was to accept the situation, remain silent, and proceed with the marriage, fully intending to do everything he could to make it work.
Gerry’s feet were still cold when he spoke with Faith, the woman who received his first impression rose, at the rehearsal dinner.
I told her everything, explaining how I felt. ‘This wedding is a mistake,’ I confessed. ‘I wish I could stop it, but I feel stuck – like I have no choice.’ Faith then pointed at my chest and challenged me, ‘Why are you doing this if you know it’s wrong? That’s not the real you.’
Honestly, it was heartbreaking, but he did go through with it. He said Faith tried to tell him he didn’t have to, but he just… couldn’t. It’s like, growing up, he always felt this pressure to make everyone happy, and it just stuck with him, even when he knew it was hurting him. He kept saying he couldn’t disappoint anyone – his daughters, Theresa’s family, even the wedding guests and everyone who worked so hard on the big day. But the worst part? He still loved Theresa, so much, even though he was worried things were moving too fast. It was like he was trapped, wanting to do the right thing for everyone, even if it meant sacrificing his own happiness. It just… killed me to read that.
Though if you ask her, she’d rather have been a jilted bride than a divorcée.
She told Us Weekly that it deeply saddened her to learn he felt so hopeless and stuck. She wished he had reached out for help instead of suffering in silence.
After Gerry and Theresa got married, it became clear she wasn’t interested in continuing a romantic connection, even privately. When Gerry visited her at her home in New Jersey just a week after their wedding, he felt completely unwelcome and like he didn’t belong.
She suggested he sleep on the sofa because she had a busy workday ahead, and that’s when things started to feel strange. He explained that while he said, “Yeah, no problem,” he was actually confused, thinking, “Why would she ask that? We’re married!”
Let me tell you, sometimes relationships throw you curveballs. I recently observed a situation with a friend, Gerry, and his partner, Theresa, that really highlighted this. They had a fantastic connection while vacationing in Costa Rica – very open and comfortable with each other. But the moment they returned home to the States, things shifted. Theresa completely withdrew, and it was like Gerry was dealing with a different person. He actually drove back to Indiana a day early after spending three nights just trying to understand what had changed. It was a really stark contrast, and a reminder that what works in one setting doesn’t always translate back to everyday life.
Gerry and his wife met in Los Angeles after the finale of Joey Graziadei’s season in March 2024 to discuss their relationship. They both admitted they’d rushed into marriage and decided to get divorced.
Gerry explained that, unlike their often stressful phone calls during their long-distance relationship, this conversation was the most comfortable they’d ever had. They finally felt able to be truly honest with each other, having overcome their final obstacle.
Even though Gerry’s daughters understood why he was getting divorced, he still found it difficult. He primarily felt like he had let people down, explaining that he hadn’t accurately assessed the situation and had hurried into a marriage he wasn’t sure about. He was caught in a cycle of negative thoughts, feeling like he’d repeatedly failed, and was deeply unhappy.
Reading about the breakup only made Gerry feel worse. He explained that while he chose not to publicly address the rumors, he wished Theresa had clarified a few things. He felt she could have easily said he was financially secure and that they had separated amicably.
Honestly, hearing him talk about it… it broke my heart. He admitted there was a time he just couldn’t face the day, couldn’t even get out of bed. He told me one night he was just lying there, staring at the ceiling, and everything crashed down. He actually thought about… well, about ending it all. He said it was fleeting, but the image… ugh. But then he thought of Jenny and Angie, his daughters. He said he could never do that to them. It wasn’t that he wanted to die, exactly. He explained it like… he just wanted to disappear. He’s always been the type who could push through anything, a real marathon runner with pain, believing it would eventually pass. But this… this felt different. He said this pain wasn’t going anywhere, and that’s what scared him the most.
Just two weeks after filing for divorce, Gerry called his wife to talk. He hadn’t been diagnosed with cancer yet – it was a slow-growing type affecting his bone marrow called Waldenström’s macroglobulinemia – but he wanted to update her on what he was going through.
He said he couldn’t recall what she said, as Theresa was very quiet during the call. He did remember, however, that she never followed up to ask how he was or what was happening.
However, Gerry shared that he still hears from former co-stars Susan Noles and Kathy Swarts quite often. He and Theresa, on the other hand, have completely stopped communicating. “We don’t talk anymore,” Gerry explained, “there’s just no reason to.”
Gerry was left questioning if Theresa joined The Golden Bachelor for genuine reasons. He shared that the support of the women on the show was actually more helpful in overcoming a difficult time than anything else. He explained that many of them understood what happened at the mansion – and felt similarly betrayed – and expressed that feeling clearly.
What really made him question Theresa’s intentions was the claim that she was spotted at the mansion with a copy of the book How to Win The Bachelor, suggesting she was there to strategize rather than connect genuinely.
Gerry wrote that seeing Theresa huddled on the couch, carefully planning how to get a rose, really bothered him. It made him realize she didn’t seem interested in finding true love, but simply in winning the competition.
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2025-11-04 17:20