Trump’s Tariffs Could Turn Bitcoin Into a Golden Goose!

In the land of crypto chaos, where market emotions run wilder than a pack of rabid squirrels, BitMEX co-founder Arthur Hayes has popped up like a jack-in-the-box, grinning from ear to ear. His proclamation? Despite the bellyaching over Trump’s tariffs, they might just work wonders for Bitcoin! Yes, dear readers, the most unpredictable cryptocurrency could be on the brink of a fabulous adventure.

Now let’s take a gander at the numbers, shall we? BTC is doing its best impression of a mighty ship, sailing at $84,224 ⚓️. With a 24h volatility of a mere 0.7% (yawn, right?), it seems to have taken a tranquil nap in a cozy harbor. And let’s not forget the market cap of a whopping $1.67 trillion! The crypto world is munching on snacks while watching the stock market’s wild waltz.

“Some of y’all are running scared, but I LOVE TARIFFS!” exclaimed Hayes, waving around his charts like a magician with a shiny wand. “Global imbalances will be corrected! The pain will be smothered in printed money, which is music to $BTC’s ears!” 🎶

— Arthur Hayes (@CryptoHayes) April 4, 2025

Just this week, on April 2nd, Trump’s tariffs swung into action like a clumsy ballet dancer, leaving the Nasdaq Index cringing as it plummeted 1000 points (yikes!) and the S&P 500 tumbling like a toddler learning to walk. Yet, miraculously, Bitcoin and its crypto chums have kept their heads above water, like ducks on a serene pond.

Crypto investors, it seems, have donned their rose-colored glasses, ignoring the tariff tantrums as Bitcoin manages to hop upwards, now prancing around $84,233 with a cheerful 0.80% gain. Even the altcoins seem a bit less panicked than earlier this week. They must have found their Zen! 🧘‍♂️

Arthur Hayes: Tariffs Might Just Lift Bitcoin as the Dollar Dips!

Our hero Hayes asserts that Trump’s trade directives could be the fairy dust that sprinkles magic on Bitcoin, especially as the US Dollar begins to stumble like an awkward toddler. With international investors setting sail away from US stocks, it’s a perfect storm for Bitcoin’s ascent!

That’s not all! Hayes believes that a hefty 65% tariff on China could send the yuan tumbling below 8.00. Poor yuan! Left to search for a safe haven, those crafty Chinese investors might just turn their eyes (and wallets) towards Bitcoin. A glimmering escape route!

And what about the Fed, you ask? Hayes points out that after the tariff spectacle, the two-year Treasury yield dove quicker than a cat on a hot tin roof. Market watchmen predict the Fed might have to loosen those purse strings or even resurrect quantitative easing (QE). Oh, the liquidity! It could be a grand carnival for risk-loving assets like Bitcoin and crypto! 🎡

But Hold Your Horses: Not All That Glitters Is Gold for BTC!

Even with Bitcoin perched steadfastly above the $82,000 mark, there’s a slight wrinkle in paradise. Long-term investors are beginning to grumble like kids denied dessert. Our crypto oracle, Ali Martinez, pointed out that more than 1,058 BTC took a field trip back into circulation on Wednesday. Oh dear, what’s this?

“Long-term holders moved over 1,058 #Bitcoin $BTC yesterday! Looks like some folks are cashing in as the old coins make their grand return!” 🍭

— Ali (@ali_charts) April 4, 2025

The re-emergence of these dusty coins could spell some trouble, adding a smidgen of selling pressure to the market. But oh, what a wild ride it is! Buckle up, dear readers, for the crypto carnival has only just begun!

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2025-04-04 15:05