In a plot twist that could only be orchestrated by intergalactic bureaucrats with an inexplicable sense of humor, Uniswap Labs—those intrepid developers championing the cause of decentralized exchanges—has reported that the US Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC), in a baffling turn of events, has decided to drop its probe into their audacious machinations. Cue the confetti! 🎉
According to a tweet (because really, where else would you go for enlightenment these days?) dated February 25, the SEC—after much deliberation, probably over a cup of lukewarm coffee—has declared that it will not be pursuing enforcement action against the Uniswap crew. This delightful little development comes hot on the heels of Uniswap’s earlier announcement regarding a Wells notice received back in the era of April 2024, when Gary Gensler still wielded the regulatory gavel like a katana. 🥷
“This is a huge win for DeFi and reaffirms what we’ve always known – that the technology we build is on the right side of the law, and our work is on the right side of history,” said Uniswap, presumably while floating on air and sipping the finest virtual champagne the blockchain has to offer.
As of this moment, the SEC has yet to make any official announcement, which has everyone guessing like it’s the ultimate game of charades. Meanwhile, Coinbase chimed in on February 21, claiming the commission would be giving its crypto exchange case the ol’ heave-ho, nearly two years after it was ignited. Rumor has it the regulator’s Enforcement Division is also shuttering investigations into the likes of Robinhood Crypto and OpenSea, presumably to free up their calendar for more pressing matters, like analyzing the snack choices in their break room.
But hold on to your towels, dear reader! This is still a developing story, and more absurdities will surely unfold as the cosmic dice continue to roll. 🛸
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2025-02-25 21:55