Why Crypto Is Trying to Become Your Friendly Neighborhood Bank (But With More Emojis)

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So, it turns out that the wild, anything-goes world of crypto is cozying up to the stuffy, buttoned-up world of traditional banks. The Wall Street Journal reports that, after the chaotic collapse of FTX (crypto’s version of a soap opera), and the subsequent financial meltdown among many crypto pals, the old guard of finance started ghosting digital assets faster than you can say “blockchain.”

Enter stage left: Donald Trump, who, in true bravado style, proclaimed America’s mission to become a “Bitcoin superpower.” One can only assume this means moon landing parties with crypto-themed cupcakes. Anyway, this might just herald the dawn of a new hybrid era where crypto and banking actually hold hands.

The Great Crypto-Bank Mashup

Major crypto players like Circle and BitGo are dusting off their application forms to snag banking charters. Not to be outdone, Coinbase Global and Paxos, purveyors of stablecoins (which sound like something you’d want on your patio, but are actually digital dollar doppelgängers), are eying similar moves.

According to Bitcoinist, the Trump folks have Congress buzzing about regularizing stablecoins with a framework so official it might just come with a red velvet rope and bouncer. This means stablecoin issuers would need licensing, turning them from rebellious crypto cowboys into rather buttoned-up financial actors.

Some firms are angling for trusty old national trust or industrial bank charters—fancy titles that mean they could accept deposits and dole out loans, just like your friendly neighborhood bank. Others are chasing niche licenses to issue stablecoins without breaking a sweat.

Politics, Regulation, and a Dash of Caution

Of course, if you manage to snag one of these charters, you’re signing up for intense regulatory babysitting. Just ask Anchorage Digital, the only crypto outfit in the US with a federal bank charter. CEO Nathan McCauley boasts that they’ve splurged tens of millions to keep the regulators happy, including installing ultra-alert anti-money laundering systems because apparently there’s always someone trying to sneak in a dodgy transaction.

Anchorage’s recent strategic hugs with Big Finance players like BlackRock and Cantor Fitzgerald prove that even the stodgiest old money is warming up to digital assets—albeit with knuckle-cracking caution. Remember when banks were angrily severing ties with crypto after the FTX meltdown? Banks like Silvergate Capital and Signature Bank took the hit, leaving crypto entrepreneurs wandering the financial desert in search of partners.

But oh, how times change! With Trump’s crew loosening the reins on crypto banking rules, soon banks won’t have to beg regulators for permission every time they want to mess around with digital coins. Fresh guidelines are due later this year, potentially opening the floodgates.

Banks like Bank of America are already rubbing their hands together at the thought of issuing a stablecoin—pending, of course, a legal system that doesn’t require a psychic to decode. US Bancorp is also dusting off its digital asset custody service, teaming up with NYDIG, which is crypto-speak for Bitcoin’s best buddy.

Meanwhile, some banks prefer to approach this brave new world with the cautious skepticism of someone considering eating mystery meat. KeyCorp’s CEO Chris Gorman views digital assets as both a tantalizing opportunity and a sneaky threat, stressing the need to understand evolving rules—especially that ever-present party pooper, anti-money laundering requirements.

Crypto and banking mashup graph

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2025-04-22 10:15