XRP, Solana, Doge: Are We All Just Pretending?

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Right, so XRP. It’s…doing things. Apparently, it exploded past $3.50. Exploded! Like a glitter cannon full of financial anxiety. 🙄 It’s decided to ditch months of “sideways accumulation,” which, let’s be honest, sounds a lot like it was just sulking. But now, apparently, it wants to hit $5? Wishful thinking, much? 💫

Apparently, the technicals are “excellent.” All the EMAs are aligned like a particularly enthusiastic yoga class. They’ve “overcome significant resistance zones.” Which, I’m assuming, means it bullied them. Good for it. 💪 And there’s a strong support zone… basically, a safety net for when it inevitably trips.

The RSI is “still high.” Which translates to: “please don’t panic, everyone’s still being irrational.” And volume? Oh, volume’s cooled. Because of course it has. It’s like a party that’s running out of champagne. 🥂

Basically, it needs more volume. Because nothing screams “serious investment” like a lot of enthusiastic people throwing money around. 💸

So, $5 is *technically* possible, apparently. If it all goes according to a very optimistic and possibly delusional plan. Let’s not hold our breath.

Solana Finally Joining the Party? (Bless its Heart)

Solana, bless its little blocky heart, has *finally* decided to join the fun. It’s soared above $180. After trailing behind everyone else. Like the awkward friend who shows up late to the wedding. 💒 It’s a “bullish move,” they say. Maybe. Or maybe it’s just briefly feeling optimistic. Don’t get too attached.

Apparently, it’s formed an “ascending triangle.” Which, I’m told, is a good thing. Like a geometric thumbs up. 👍 All the moving averages are going upwards. Because *that’s* how you turn things around, apparently. Months of “deliberation and consolidation” – which sounds suspiciously like boredom – are officially over. 🎉

It’s “outperforming the market for the first time in a long time.” Which is a sentence that makes me deeply suspicious. Are they trying too hard?

So, $200 is the next target. Then $230-$250. Just casually hurtling towards the stratosphere. 🚀 Please let me know if you’ve found a good parachute.

Dogecoin: Still Here? Still…a Thing?

DOGE. Oh, Dogecoin. It broke above $0.20. A significant resistance level, they say. I’m just trying to remember what year it is. It’s gained almost 40% in a few days. Which is…something. 🤷‍♀️

Apparently, all the moving averages are being broken. And there’s an “ascending channel pattern.” I’m starting to feel like I need a geometry textbook. The RSI is in “overbought territory.” Which is code for: “brace for a correction.”

The volume is increasing. Mostly because people are still amused by the whole thing. 😂 And let’s be honest, who *isn’t* slightly amused?

So, $0.30 is the next target. Then $0.35 and higher. Possibly into the realm of absurdity. But hey, at least it’s entertaining.

Investors and traders should “not be sleeping on DOGE.” I’d rather sleep, to be honest. 😴 But you do you.

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2025-07-22 03:15