🌾✨ Abu Dhabi Tells Crypto Miners: Farmland is for Crops, Not Coins! ✨🌾

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In a move that could only be described as a splendidly absurd exercise in bureaucratic zeal, the Abu Dhabi Agriculture and Food Safety Authority (ADAFSA) has decreed that agricultural land shall no longer be sullied by the grubby hands of crypto miners. 🌾🚫

Woe betide the hapless soul who dares to defy this edict! A fine of 100,000 AED ($27,229) awaits, along with the suspension of municipal services, the confiscation of mining hardware, and the ignominy of having one’s farmland disconnected from the electrical grid. Truly, a fate worse than a soggy cucumber sandwich. 💸🔌

ADAFSA, with all the gravitas of a vicar scolding a wayward choirboy, proclaimed that such activities are a blight upon the region’s “sustainability” policies and a flagrant disregard for land use provisions. “Farmland is for turnips, not tokens,” they might as well have intoned. 🥕🙄

“Such activities fall outside the scope of permitted economic uses defined by the authority and are not allowed on farmlands,” they declared, with all the flair of a headmaster reading out the school rules. 📜🤓

The great crypto mining debate rages on, with critics clucking like hens about its ecological impact, while advocates chirp merrily about vertically integrated operations recycling runoff energy. One might imagine a Dickensian scene: miners toiling in the shadows, while green energy evangelists beam benevolently from above. 🌍⚡

Some research suggests crypto mining can aid environmental efforts

Ah, the cutthroat world of crypto mining-a business so competitive that miners would sell their grandmothers for a cheaper watt. Yet, lo and behold, over 50% of Bitcoin’s energy in 2023 came from renewable sources like hydroelectric and geothermal power, or the rather poetic “runoff energy” from industrial processes. Who knew flaring gas fields could be so chic? 💡🌊

In a paper that might as well have been titled “How to Look Busy While Saving the Planet,” researchers in August 2024 outlined how proof-of-work mining could convert methane energy into something useful. Landfill-gas-to-energy systems, they say, siphon methane from garbage and turn it into electricity, all while keeping the atmosphere from becoming a giant, noxious trash heap. 🗑️♻️

This echoes earlier research, including a 2023 paper that boldly claimed mining could reduce global emissions by 8% by 2030. One can almost hear the authors patting themselves on the back, champagne flutes in hand, as they declare, “We’ve cracked it!” 🥂📉

Yet, the critics remain unmoved, like a stubborn aunt at a family dinner. US lawmakers have been on a crusade to get the EPA to clamp down on mining, citing pollution, noise, and the general affront to good taste. One wonders if they’d prefer we all return to bartering with chickens. 🐔🚫

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2025-10-01 20:27