Alan Alda Details Turning 90 Amid Battle With Parkinson’s Disease

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Alan Alda is reflecting on marking a major milestone.

Four months after celebrating his 90th birthday on January 28th, the actor best known for MASH* spoke about what it was like to reach the milestone and how he’s coping with Parkinson’s disease as he ages.

Alan recently turned 90 and was recalling his birthday celebration. He shared that while dining out, the waiter brought him a cupcake with a candle and led everyone in singing ‘Happy Birthday, older gentleman,’ as reported by People magazine at a 92NY event in New York City on May 21.

After I blew out the candle, they pointed out that I had done it all on my own, without any assistance. They made sure I understood it was my own doing.

Actor Alan Alda, known for his role on The West Wing, recently shared a story about realizing how old he’s become. He and his wife, Arlene Alda, have three daughters: Eve, Elizabeth, and Beatrice, who are 67, 65, and 64 years old, respectively. It was thinking about them that made his age truly hit home.

He joked that you really feel your age when, like him, you realize all your daughters are old enough to be on Medicare.

The Emmy-winning actor says he and his wife often talk about the possibility of being separated in the future.

Alan remembered picking up Carl Reiner for dinner and, during the drive, Carl shared that his wife had recently passed away. This led to a conversation about how Alan and his wife, Arlene, often discussed how they would cope if one of them died first, as reported by People magazine.

He found himself wondering what life would be like for her if he were to die before she did, and what he would do if she passed away first. He was thinking about this as he lightly bumped his car into the center divider on Sunset Boulevard – just a small impact on the sidewalk. His friend, Carl, jokingly reassured him, saying his driving style meant he shouldn’t be too concerned.

Alan and his wife bonded over a shared sense of humor from the moment they met in 1957 – they both ended up eating rum cake that had dropped on the floor at a party!

He shared in a 2021 social media post that they bonded after playfully sharing a rum cake that fell on the floor. However, he admitted he was already smitten with her earlier in the evening, captivated by her laughter at his jokes – he said she won him over immediately.

To see what more stars had to say about their long-lasting marriages, read on.
 

Yet, Alan doesn’t measure getting older by his age.

He said people often point out how old you are, but he doesn’t think of age in terms of years. Instead, he measures it by how often people offer to help him, figuring that’s a good indication of how others perceive his age.

Even though Alan was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease over a decade ago, he’s remained optimistic, viewing it as a challenging but fascinating problem to figure out.

Throughout everything, Alan’s wife, Alrene, has been his constant companion. They’ve been married for almost 70 years, having wed when Alan was just 21 years old.

The Emmy-winning actor says he and his wife often talk about the possibility of being separated in the future.

Alan remembered picking up Carl Reiner to go to dinner, and during the drive, Carl shared that his wife had recently passed away. This led to a conversation about how Alan and his wife, Arlene, often discussed what they would do if one of them died first, as reported by People magazine.

He found himself wondering what life would be like for her if he were to die before she did, and what he would do if she passed away first. He was thinking about this as he lightly bumped his car into the center divider on Sunset Boulevard – just a small impact on the sidewalk. His friend, Carl, jokingly reassured him that, knowing his driving style, a minor bump like that wasn’t something to worry about.

You know, I always say a shared sense of humor is key to a lasting relationship, and Alan and his wife are a perfect example! I heard the story of how they first met – it’s adorable! Apparently, back in 1957, they bonded over a funny mishap at a party: they both ended up eating rum cake that had fallen on the floor! It was a silly, lighthearted moment that clearly sparked something special.

He shared on X (formerly Twitter) that they bonded after playfully sharing a rum cake that fell on the floor. However, he admitted he was already smitten with her earlier in the evening, captivated by her laughter at his jokes. He said he fell for her the moment he heard her laugh – ‘She had me at Ha.’

To see what more stars had to say about their long-lasting marriages, read on.

In their 2020 book, What Makes a Marriage Last, Hermann explained to Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue that he never expected so much laughter in his marriage. He believes that joy is central to who they are as a couple. He added that their marriage thrives because he feels loved for who he truly is, which he describes as a true act of grace.

He also shared that finding humor is essential, even after disagreements. Often, after a heated argument, one of them will try to lighten the mood with a joke referencing the very thing they were fighting about. “It’s about finding a way back to connection,” he explained, “acknowledging that neither of us is completely right or wrong, but wanting to find common ground again.” When that happens, he feels confident they can resolve their issues.

They’ve managed to avoid major changes in their relationship by following the same advice they received before getting married in 2003. Even with five children, they prioritize weekly date nights and have intentionally chosen not to buy a television, opting instead for other ways to connect.

Chip says his biggest piece of advice is to passionately pursue the person you love. After twenty years, he still approaches his wife as if he’s hoping for a second date. He jokes that while he can’t guarantee she’ll never stray, it won’t be because he stopped showing her affection, forgetting special occasions, or failing to tell her he loves her.

Kevin Bacon jokingly advises against taking relationship advice from celebrities, a sentiment echoed by his and Kyra Sedgwick’s mantra: “Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty.” They developed this phrase to quickly shut down any unwanted discussion about their 36-year marriage.

In reality, they prioritize resolving conflicts quickly and avoid prolonged arguments. As Sedgwick explained, they focus on finding solutions rather than winning. “We don’t like to fight, so when we do, we’re both trying to fix things, because fighting is awful.” Ultimately, she emphasized that they are committed to making their relationship work, stating, “There is no Plan B. No matter what, we want to work it out.”

After over 37 years of marriage, the actors have learned how to argue constructively. As the Family Ties alum explained, they avoid bringing up past hurts. “Some couples target their partner’s weaknesses,” he said, “but we don’t do that.” They do argue sometimes, but instead of trying to immediately fix things, he gives his wife space when she needs it. She, in turn, tries to be understanding, reminding herself that even if he says something hurtful, he’s a good person and likely didn’t intend to cause pain.

In December 2024, ahead of their 40th wedding anniversary, Curtis shared on Today that her husband still makes her laugh more than anyone else. She jokingly added that he must find something to like about her, even if she isn’t sure what it is.

As someone who’s spent a lot of time thinking about relationships, I’ve learned that the key to making them last is accepting that they’re always changing. My partner and I have been together for over 20 years, through career changes – I even released a cookbook a few years ago! – raising our twins Gideon and Harper, and navigating all of life’s ups and downs. Marriage isn’t static, and that’s okay. You evolve, and your attraction to each other does too. Let’s be real, even intimacy can become routine, so you have to be willing to explore new ways to connect. There will be times you feel distant, even lose that spark, and that’s when you really have to work at rediscovering each other – but it’s not about recreating the past, it’s about finding a new attraction that fits who you both are now, as you both grow and change. Ultimately, you start to fall in love with who they are as a person – their soul – and then, wonderfully, their physical presence again. It’s a constant evolution, a beautiful morphing, and in a strange way, we keep falling in love with each other, differently, over and over again.

The comedic duo genuinely believe that laughter extends their lives. It’s not just about their 19-year partnership, but every moment of joy. As the actress from Can You Ever Forgive Me? explained, they actually calculate how much time a particularly hilarious moment adds to their lifespan. She jokingly keeps a running tally, estimating a big laugh could buy her “two more months to live!”

They also limit how long disagreements last. Following the advice to never go to bed angry, Falcone realized that holding onto anger overnight is pointless. She found she’d often forgotten what she was even upset about. She believes arguments are unproductive when everyone is tired or has had something to drink, and has never had a late-night disagreement end with a satisfying resolution and a truce.

Both having been married previously, the couple met in 1995 and quickly found themselves blending families, each with two children. The Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist actor remembers realizing early on that the children already had mothers and didn’t need another one. Instead, she decided to be a supportive figure. “Everyone needs a cheerleader,” she explained, “and I could be that. I focused on being a positive presence, letting their parents handle discipline and teaching them values.”

The Cheers actor completely agreed. He believes offering friendship is key. “It’s about saying, ‘I won’t discipline or judge you, I’ll just be there for you.’ You have to genuinely be present and supportive.”

As a longtime observer of successful relationships, I’ve always been fascinated by Elton John and David Furnish. They were among the first to take advantage of Britain’s civil union laws, having a ceremony in 2005, and then again nine years later when they could legally marry – marking both milestones. But the anniversary they really celebrate is a simple dinner party back in 1993! A friend set them up, and that’s where their incredible journey began.

What I find truly special about their connection is their commitment to communication. Every Saturday, no matter where their busy lives take them, they write each other a handwritten note. They estimate they’ve exchanged around 1,352 letters! David explains it feels deeply personal and spiritual, a chance to reflect and connect. And Elton agrees – he believes consistent communication is key to making a relationship last. It’s a beautiful practice and a testament to their enduring love.

After quietly building a 40-year marriage – she even dreamed of meeting him six months before they did – they’ve consistently made their relationship a central part of their lives, even as everything else has changed. They prioritize their marriage, making sure to reconnect when they lose focus. If she could give one piece of advice, it would be to cherish that bond above all else. He passionately affirmed his devotion, saying he’d do anything for her, facing any challenge without letting anything interfere with expressing his love. He emphasized that if you value your marriage and your long-term happiness, you must protect it fiercely.

ABC News reporter Roberts admits she doesn’t enjoy casual check-in calls. “I don’t like it when people call just to ask ‘What’s up,'” she explained. However, a friend helped her see things differently regarding a frequent caller – a beloved TV weatherman.

“One friend pointed out that maybe he just feels comforted hearing my voice, like everything is okay when he does,” Roberts recalled. “It was a sweet thought I hadn’t considered. If it makes him happy, it should matter to me.”

Now, she takes a moment to be kind. “I take a breath and say, ‘Sweetie, I’m busy, but what’s new with you? Good. I’m glad you called. I have to go now. Talk to you later. Love you.’ It means the world to him, and it only takes two minutes to be nice.” They celebrated their 29th anniversary in September 2024.

I’ve always admired Kelly and Mark’s relationship, and hearing how they built such a strong marriage over nearly 30 years is really inspiring. I remember reading about one of their early fights – apparently Mark actually threw Kelly’s ring out the window! They’ve said that in those first years, little disagreements can quickly become huge problems, especially with the stress of finances, work, or raising kids when you’re exhausted. But Mark taught Kelly a simple but powerful lesson: when things get heated, just walk away and take a deep breath. She realized it wasn’t a dealbreaker, just a moment that didn’t have to define their whole marriage. They’ve definitely put that wisdom to good use! They’ve always seemed so genuinely happy together, and Mark is right – any couple that appears truly content has almost certainly weathered some really tough times and come out stronger. And that’s something to celebrate, isn’t it?

She describes herself as an introvert, almost a loner, while he’s a total people person – he jokingly calls himself “the mayor of everywhere.” She’s a bit messy, and he’s a perfectionist, as she put it. But after being married since 2003, they’ve learned to accept each other’s differences.

The actress from How to Get Away With Murder says she gives this advice to all her friends who are getting married: “Marriage doesn’t begin at the wedding. It starts when you realize you love someone deeply, even though they have a habit or trait that you know will annoy you. It’s that moment of thinking, ‘This is going to be tough,’ followed immediately by, ‘But I love him anyway.’ That’s really when your marriage begins.”

Maintaining a long-term relationship, especially one lasting 50 years, requires quickly resolving conflicts. Jane Fonda, star of Grace and Frankie, explained that she usually takes the initiative to apologize after an argument. She finds it easy because she deeply loves her partner and doesn’t want them to feel alone, even for a short time.

Ideally, she avoids needing to apologize at all. She’s learned that saying hurtful things in anger will ultimately cause you more pain later, as you’ll regret the words you spoke to someone you care about. This creates a double dose of anger, which isn’t healthy for either your well-being or the relationship.

It’s fitting that Jerry, a former judge, says his long marriage to the iconic Judge Judy works because he generally lets her have the final say. For her, the key is accepting someone for who they are, even if you don’t always agree with the outcome. Their marriage initially ended in 1990 when he wasn’t able to provide the support she needed after her father passed away. However, they remarried quickly a year later, and she understood he wouldn’t suddenly become a homemaker or take charge of events.

She explained simply that unhappiness in relationships often comes from trying to change your partner. “You can try,” she said, “but they’ll always resent it. Don’t marry someone expecting them to be different than they are.”

The actor from Lost credits his wife with being the rock of their family. He told TopMob News in April 2025 that her patience and support—especially while he travels for work—have been invaluable. He described her as “fantastic” and essential to their family’s stability.

The actor described his wife as incredibly patient and said she and their two sons help him stay grounded, no matter what challenges he faces.

“They shape my values,” he added. “It’s great to have that perspective and North Star.”

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2026-05-31 00:48