Bitcoin 🤑
BTC $87,239
24h volatility: 0.7% (snore 😴)
Market cap: $1.74 T (big deal, so what? 🤷♂️)
Vol. 24h: $37.05 B (yawn… 💤)
So, Bitcoin’s still acting like it’s got a date with the floor. Every time it tries to bounce, someone’s there with a “NOT TODAY, SATOSHI!” sign. Now, it’s flirting with $87k, and the whales and sharks? They’re swimming for the exits. 🚀→🚪 Couple that with ETFs bleeding like a stuck pig, and you’ve got a recipe for “bearish.” Or as I like to call it, “Monday.”
Bitcoin’s 2021 Replay: Double Top, Double Trouble
Crypto guru Tracer’s like, “Hey, remember 2021? Good times, right? Well, guess what? We’re doing it again!” Double top, dump, bounce, dump. It’s like a bad sitcom rerun. Nobody’s ready for this, folks. Nobody. Except maybe Tracer, who’s probably sitting there with a “I told you so” face. 🙄
$BTC repeats 2021 pattern.
Double top. Dump. Bounce. Another dump.
Nobody is prepared for this scenario.
Do NOT say I didn’t warn you later. 😤
– ᴛʀᴀᴄᴇʀ (@DeFiTracer) December 23, 2025
The chart’s screaming “temporary rebound,” but then it’s like, “Psych! Another leg down!” Tracer’s saying we could see $100k, but then it’s straight to $60k. Because why not? It’s Bitcoin. It does what it wants. 🌪️
Santiment’s like, “Hey, fewer wallets holding one Bitcoin, down 2.2% since March 3. But hey, the big boys? They’re stacking. 136,670 BTC more. So, it’s not all doom and gloom. Just mostly doom.”
Bitcoin wallet data | Source: Santiment (aka the bearer of bad news 📉)
Bitcoin tried to hit $90k this week. Spoiler alert: it got rejected harder than I did at my high school prom. And its correlation with tech stocks, gold, and silver? Negative. Like, “I’m not going up, and you can’t make me!” 😠
If Bitcoin won’t go up when tech stocks rise, and it won’t go up when gold and silver rise, when will it go up? The answer is: it won’t. The Bitcoin trade is over. The suckers are all in. If Bitcoin won’t go up, it can only go down. If HODLers are lucky it won’t be a slow death. 💀
– Peter Schiff (@PeterSchiff) December 23, 2025
Bitcoin ETFs: The Great Escape
US spot Bitcoin ETFs? More like US spot Bitcoin “Get Me Out of Here!” After $497 million in outflows last week, this week’s like, “Hold my beer.” $188 million out the door. BlackRock’s IBIT? Biggest loser, $157.3 million gone. 1,792 Bitcoins said “peace out.” And the share price? Flirting with $50. Romantic. 💔
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2025-12-24 15:03