So, the weekend’s here, and the bulls are supposedly in charge. Big whoop. CoinMarketCap says so, but let’s be real-it’s like my ex claiming they’re “dominating” their life. Sure, Jan. 🦬💨

BTC/USD
Bitcoin’s up 0.25% in the last 24 hours. Wow. My retirement plan just got a whole lot more secure. 🤑

On the hourly chart, BTC’s stuck between $87,791 and $88,522. It’s like watching paint dry, but with more decimals. Sideways trading? More like sideways snoozing. 😴

On the bigger time frame, Bitcoin’s nowhere near the main levels. Volume’s low. Buyers and sellers are probably out getting coffee. Or therapy. ☕💭
Bulls want $90,000? Good luck. That’s like me trying to finish a marathon. Not happening. 🏃♂️💔

Midterm outlook? Same old, same old. Volatility’s taking a vacation until the end of the month. Just like my motivation. 🏖️😩
Bitcoin’s at $88,222 right now. Yawn. 🥱
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2025-12-20 18:56