Cryptonews

According to Peter Schiff (aka Captain Doom), crypto donors might have to rethink their midterm election strategies. Turns out, losing billions can put a damper on your political clout. Who knew? 🤷‍♂️

The digital currency Zcash (ZEC), a darling of the discreet and the devious, has been on a tear of late, adding 18.7% against the U.S. dollar today. Despite a 14% dip this week-a mere hiccup in its ascent-its current price of $586 marks a 125% surge over the past 30 days. This meteoric rise has propelled the Zcash network to the zenith of the PoW heap, with its Equihash algorithm outpacing Bitcoin’s SHA256 in terms of profits. A triumph, one might say, for those who prefer their transactions as opaque as a London pea-souper.

Why the pessimism, you ask? Well, two major bearish signals have decided to crash the party simultaneously. Together, they’re like the uninvited guests who eat all the guacamole and leave before the good part. 🥑🚫

Japan, already flirting with Ripple in banks and remittances, now plots a ballet with stablecoins and next-gen payment systems, attempting to seduce cross-border investments into a faster, shinier rhythm.

In the daily timeframe, our dear Bitcoin is riding a downward escalator to the land of lower highs and lower lows. Volume spikes like a barista on a caffeine binge, yet the asset flirts with the $80,537-$85,000 level, teasing a short-term bottom. Resistance at $95,000-$100,000 looms like a grumpy troll under a bridge, daring anyone to cross. Optimism? More like counter-trend daydreaming. 🌉😴

The outflows were so dramatic that they made the record books. The third-largest in history, only trailing behind last year’s tariffs-induced panic and the 2018 market meltdown-because apparently, nothing says “fun” like watching your investments evaporate faster than pennies in a fountain. Yet, just when you think it’s all doom and gloom, there’s a tiny whisper-a faint glimmer of a turnaround-probably just the market’s version of a sarcastic smirk.

Feast your eyes on the weekly chart-$PEPE looks about as promising as a flat tire in a thunderstorm. The horizontal support at $0.00000530? Gone, poof! Like my hopes every time I check the markets. Now, it’s resting precariously at $0.00000432-barely hanging on by a thread. One more sneeze, and it’s off to the last fortress at $0.00000157, where even the most optimistic trader would throw in the towel and a few keyboard punches. 🤧🧻

Apparently, someone whispered “bull market” in Bitcoin’s ear, and the whole gang decided to join the party. Fresh momentum? More like a caffeine-fueled sprint after a month of snoozing. Let’s just hope it doesn’t crash into the sofa again by tomorrow. 🛋️💥

So, picture this: Bitcoin and MicroStrategy are minding their own business, and then-BAM!-they take a header. No warning, no note, just pure chaos. 🌀 Traders were left scratching their heads until Crypto Banter’s Ran Neuner dropped a bombshell: “Hey, maybe it’s because MicroStrategy’s getting the boot from MSCI or NASDAQ?” 🤔

Industry insiders in South Korea have been whispering to one another – with a side of iced coffee – that the FIU is gearing up to unleash some brutal magic on the likes of Korbit, Gopax, Bithumb, and Coinone. Why? Because they had the audacity to follow in the footsteps of Dunamu, who, like a hapless chocolate teapot, managed to melt under the intense scrutiny of a 35.2 billion KRW fine (a neat sum, indeed).