Medieval Prince Harry “would have killed” William, imagines Young James Bond author – as he compares King Charles to a murdered monarch

by

I started by thanking Charlie Higson for being on the show, and he jokingly replied that it was a pleasure to talk about himself. This was a bit strange, since the conversation wasn’t actually supposed to be about him.

Okay, so Paul Whitehouse is a fascinating guy – fronted an 80s band, was a comedic mastermind behind ‘The Fast Show’, and then went on to write for James Bond, kids’ books, and hit TV shows. But honestly? The topic of his new book is way more captivating. We’re talking seriously compelling, the kind of story that really grabs you – and maybe makes you wince a little!

According to Higson, if Harry had lived in medieval times, he would have likely been a ruthless but effective ruler – possibly even killing his brother and imprisoning his father to seize the throne, and people would have applauded his strength. He believes Harry would have thrived as a warrior king, actively promoting himself as a champion of his country, and ultimately, he thinks Harry would have been the most successful of them all.

Meghan would have faced much harsher criticism if Harry hadn’t spoken out. People would have attacked her, portraying her as a manipulative and controlling figure, similar to how Queen Isabella of France was vilified. As for Charles, the author suggests he could have met a fate like that of King Edward II – abandoned, imprisoned, and ultimately murdered by his wife. The current situation, therefore, is a more favorable outcome for both of them.

I spoke with Higson before news broke about Prince Andrew’s issues, but the author doesn’t hesitate to draw parallels to criminal behavior.

He compares his perspective to watching The Godfather. The film features a ruthless and violent family, but you end up rooting for them because you get to know them. He feels he’s experienced something similar, developing a kind of acceptance – almost like Stockholm syndrome – that leads him to believe the monarchy, despite its flaws, might be the most reasonable way to choose a leader.

The author argues that choosing a president through elections could lead to someone like Liz Truss or Nigel Farage – people who might manipulate situations to get ahead. When asked if someone admirable, like David Attenborough, could be president, the author points out that genuinely good people generally don’t want the job. They believe power attracts those who are driven to climb to the top, a pattern observed throughout the book. When jokingly suggested that the author themselves might be a good president, they quickly dismiss the idea, stating they would be just as flawed as any other leader.

He’s at least honest about being a bit of a control freak. Discussing the current Fast Show reunion tour, he says everyone gets along great, but that’s because there was a clear leader structure. He contrasts this with Monty Python, which he describes as a democracy that led to competition. With The Fast Show, he and Paul Whitehouse were always the leaders – they created, produced, edited, and essentially put the whole show together, acting like parental figures.

He’s certainly capable of working with others. The book, titled ‘Willie, Willie, Harry, Stee’ – a name also used for Higson’s podcast, inspired by a traditional rhyme listing kings and queens in order – features illustrations by Jim Moir.

Higson recalls receiving some initial sketches and realizing the illustrator was focused on historical accuracy, likely assuming the book was a formal history. Higson immediately told him, ‘That’s not what I want. I specifically want a bold, comedic style – the ‘Vic Reeves flavour’ – not a historically accurate depiction.’

Which it certainly does: witness the picture accompanying the chapter on Henry III.

Higson calls it his favorite story from the book. It describes how Henry won a battle, and Simon de Montfort was killed. After the fighting, one of Henry’s supporters, Roger Mortimer, sent a gruesome gift to his wife – de Montfort’s head, with his testicles placed over his nose, which she was understandably thrilled to receive.

Read More

2025-11-18 04:20