World Bank Falls for Ripple’s XRP Magic Trick 🎩✨

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In a move that shocked absolutely no one who owns a “Lambo or Bust” bumper sticker, the World Bank has released a report gushing over Ripple’s Interledger and XRP like a teenager discovering Bitcoin for the first time. Apparently, enabling the exchange of currencies across different networks is “very promising”-because, you know, the concept of money moving wasn’t already a thing before blockchain. 🙄

The World Bank Discovers the Internet… But for Money 💸

Crypto influencer SMQKE-whose credibility is only slightly higher than that guy yelling about Dogecoin at a gas station-shared the report, which breathlessly explains how XRP lets you receive any currency you want. Groundbreaking! The bank compared Interledger to the Internet, except instead of cat videos, it routes “packets of value.” Because nothing says “financial revolution” like repackaging Venmo with extra steps.

The report also mentioned Ripple’s adoption of ISO 20022, a payment standard so exciting it makes watching paint dry seem like a UFC match. XRP, ever the overachiever, moonlights as a “bridge currency,” which sounds impressive until you realize it’s just digital middlemanning-like PayPal, but with more lawsuits.

Nodes on the Interledger apparently function like routers, except instead of Wi-Fi, they shuttle money between people who still think “hodl” is profound financial advice. SMQKE, ever the hype man, reminded everyone that Ripple once worked with the World Bank, because nothing screams “legitimacy” like partnering with an institution that charges countries interest for existing.

Ripple Conquers Africa (Or At Least One Bank)

In a stunning twist, Ripple announced a partnership with South Africa’s Absa Bank-because if there’s one continent desperate for crypto solutions, it’s definitely not the one where people still barter goats. Pro-XRP lawyer Bill Morgan (who definitely doesn’t own a suspiciously large bag of XRP) called this a “major win,” which in crypto terms means “the price dropped 3% immediately after.”

Morgan hinted there’s “more to know” behind the announcement, which is corporate-speak for “we’re hoping you don’t ask too many questions.” Earlier this year, Ripple also teamed up with African fintech firms Chipper Cash and Yellow Card-because nothing solves poverty like stablecoins and speculative gambling.

Meanwhile, XRP’s price sits at a cool $2.40, down 3% in 24 hours, proving once again that “fundamentals” in crypto are just vibes and hopium. 📉

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2025-10-17 04:13