In a twist that would make even the most stoic blockchain enthusiast chuckle, a statue honoring Bitcoin’s pseudonymous founder, Satoshi Nakamoto, has pulled a Houdini in Lugano, Switzerland.
The statue, one of three created to immortalize a man who’s arguably the only billionaire who’s never cashed a paycheck, was last seen chilling in Villa Ciani park before deciding it needed a “digital detox.”
Where in the Blockchain Is Satoshi?
On August 2, the internet collectively facepalmed when news broke that the statue had been stolen. Because of course it was.
The mystery began when social media sleuth Gritto sounded the alarm louder than a crypto scammer’s Telegram channel:
Hey @planb_network where the F… has Satoshi Nakamoto’s statue gone?!
— Gritto (@Grittoshi) August 2, 2025
Tether CEO Paolo Ardoino, ever the optimist, confirmed that “an unknown individual” was to blame. No, Satoshi himself didn’t materialize to reclaim his likeness. Probably.
Gritto, clearly Switzerland’s answer to Sherlock Holmes, theorized that the statue was likely abducted by a gang of drunk Swiss patriots during National Day celebrations. Because nothing says “patriotic fervor” like stealing a statue of a crypto anarchist.
“There are cameras everywhere in the city so i assume, they just threw it inside the lake beside, before going home. No way, they could have carried it unnoticed in the city. So my opinion: it is in the lake, just beside its previous location,” Gritto stated.
0.1 BTC: The Price of Honesty (or Theft)
a decentralized future, represented by a statue bolted to the ground with what appears to be little more than duct tape and hope.
The statue’s design, which “disappears” from view as you walk by, was clearly a metaphor for Satoshi’s ability to ghost the entire planet. Brilliant!
This was supposed to be one of 21 global installations celebrating Bitcoin’s legacy. Two more exist—in El Salvador’s Bitcoin Beach and Tokyo—but let’s be honest, the real goal here is to turn Satoshi into the blockchain version of the Three Tenors. 🎤
Despite the theft, organizers vow to install 18 more statues. Because if there’s one thing the crypto world loves, it’s doubling down on memes until they become legacy infrastructure.
As for Satoshi’s legacy? Let’s just say his whitepaper will outlive any statue. But hey, at least the lake’s got a new paperweight. 🏛️💧
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2025-08-03 16:28