Markets
What to know:
- Beth Hammack, Cleveland Fed’s “I Hate Fun” President, says interest rates will stay locked at “awkward party level” until inflation or employment does something shocking. 🚫💸
- She side-eyes last week’s CPI report, blaming the government shutdown for turning data collection into a chaotic TikTok dance. 🐍
- Bitcoin, which usually thrives on Fed leniency, has been falling apart like my dating life in 2025. 💔
Let’s get one thing straight: Beth Hammack, the Fed’s resident “spend less, cry more” guru (appointed in 2024 after a Goldman Sachs career), has made her hawkish vibe clear. But 2026? Oh, sweet summer child. She’ll be a voting FOMC member, ready to rain on everyone’s parade. ☔
The Fed’s FOMC is basically a democracy… if democracy means 12 people arguing over coffee about how to break the economy. Four district presidents rotate in, and in 2026, Hammack gets her turn to scream about inflation. 🗣️
“My base case is we can stay here [with rates] until inflation finally remembers its target or unemployment starts a TikTok trend,” she told the WSJ. Translation: “Don’t expect anything fun.”
When asked about the November CPI drop to 2.7% (a number so low it makes you question reality), Hammack said, “Take it with a grain of salt.” Because nothing says “trust me” like blaming the government shutdown for bad data. 🤷♀️
Her real estimate? 2.9% or 3.0%. Classic Fed: “We’re not wrong, we’re just… busy.”
Easier monetary policy is supposed to make risk assets happy. Stocks? Thriving. Gold? Breaking records. Bitcoin? Nope. It’s been plummeting since September’s rate cut, proving that in 2025, even crypto can’t escape the Fed’s cold shoulder. ❄️
A Big Break With Waller
Chris Waller, Trump’s potential Fed chair pick, thinks rates are 50-100 basis points above “neutral.” Hammack? She says they’re “a little below neutral,” meaning her policy is “slightly fun.” Cue the Fed’s version of The Odd Couple. 🤝
With Hammack and Waller at odds, 2026’s FOMC meetings might be less “economic strategy” and more “Hollywood drama.” And whoever’s chair? Good luck getting seven votes without a group therapy session. 🧠
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2025-12-21 18:38