Oh, the zealous rush to shield Bitcoin from the clutches of future quantum terrors! Such urgency in our modern times! 🏃💥
Take heed of this jest: Solana flaunts post-quantum bravado on the testnet, as if brandishing digital cutlasses. Ethereum too drafts its map towards this quantum fortress. Academics shake their heads – “We must prepare!” they insist.
The Bitcoin circle, despite weighing similar suggestions, holds its breath, pondering if swift action suffices before quantum dread becomes palpable. But behold! Michael Saylor, patron of BTC corporate treasury, boldly proclaims no such dire need: Quantum machines will “forge BTC” stronger. 🛠️✨

Saylor’s Dichotomous Quandary
Saylor posits that mighty tech entities must bathe in enlightenment before quantum advances waltz to the masses. Meanwhile, governments must padlock their vaults. Most experts, alas, roll their eyes at his “simplistic” naivety.
Eli Ben-Sasson, architect of Starknet and Zcash, allegedly murmurs against Saylor’s theatrical plans: “Agree, in theory. But does the old code not gnash its teeth against easy fixes – a tangled web from which we cannot escape?”
“Agree, in theory. Aren’t you worried code is by now so ossified, and simple fixes (like op_cat) so hard to push that in practice it just won’t happen?”
Mihailo Bjelic, erstwhile chief of Polygon, marvels: “A mere two years, if the pathetic transaction stream wanders into hibernation. Six months, an impossibility! A grand upgrading, devoid of strife – a fantasy!”
“The upgrade takes ~2 years (~6 months if all regular txs stop, which is unrealistic). And this is assuming this major upgrade goes through smoothly, without contention (which is hard to imagine).”
The Quantum Roulette Unveiled
Behold! Google’s quantum strides make timid advances. Five to fifteen years or more dare to threaten Bitcoin’s very existence, reveal the wise ones. Yet Charles Edwards, sage of Capriole Investments, tosses a dreary forecast: Prophesying a chilling 34%-55% chance of quantum devastation from 2028-2030. Bitcoin’s valor hanging in the balance, the upgrade neglected!
“Given a 2-3 yr timeline to deploy fix, this is the current discount rate. And it is growing. Every. Single. Day.”
The twin guards of Bitcoin’s castle – ECDSA and SHA-256 – waver. ECDSA, a mere plaything for quantum juggernauts, threatens to lay bare private and public keys. Yet for those in the dusty realms of the Satoshi era, peril looms anew, while the fresher Segwit addresses smirk at quantum arrows from yonder distances, experts proclaim.


Moral of the Day
- Some scholars lament that Bitcoin may miss its temporal sloop to the hallowed land of quantum defense. 💔
- The fare from the epoch of Satoshi and kindred addresses, vulnerable to the long-range quantum gambits. 🏹
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2025-12-18 08:13